19 October 2011

I don't own any of it

After my sister's hurried facebook announcement about my niece I got to thinking of how I may be coming across in this blog.  I just want to be clear that I don't think I "own" any of the tragedies that I have seen around me.  I'm not looking for sympathy for myself as I am well aware that while I might hurt I have not been directly affected on a daily basis. 

Throughout my life I've been surrounded by people who want to one up you on who has it worse.  I know that I have it pretty great right now.  I realized last night that my sister posted on facebook at the same time that she sent me a message asking if I got mom's text.  Not even giving me a chance to reply had I gotten the message.  Had I not gotten the text I would have found out on FB and she was fine with that.  Does she not remember the drama that happened when my sister in law posted about TC's birth before I could call my family?  Both my sister and my sister in law posted these things because they wanted to own the information and in turn own event. 

I have never understood why people want to take on another's tragedy, maybe it helps them feel better about them self, maybe they want to nurse a wounded bird - who knows.  As for me, I have a great amount of empathy for other people.  I always have, when something horrible happens I am often moved to tears for those who have to actually go through it.  I was a sensitive child and that never left me as I grew up.  That being said, I have never been one to flock to a blog upon learning that a spouse was KIA (ever notice how readership skyrockets when then happens, it's kind of sick).

I share these things on my blog because I am thinking about them.  I also believe in the power of prayer, not that I think we should get everything we pray for because we all have a path set out for us.  Even if a prayer chain isn't going to save the day I believe that many times the recipient can feel the love. 

Not that I think anyone was thinking that I was a tragedy chaser or anything I just wanted to make it clear that I am not.  There have just been a lot of crappy things happening to people who have touched my life.


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