2009

Stolen from Katie at The Life of an Army Wife

1. What did you do in 2009 that you’d never done before?
Carried a baby into the second trimester. There were some scary moments but we are in the home stretch! After having a miscarriage a few years ago this is something I wasn't sure I would ever be able to do.

2. Did you keep your New Year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I don't make them, in 2010 I really just want to get back to my pre baby weight

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Several people I used to be close with

4. Did anyone close to you die?
My dad's old best friend, I hope they are able to see past what tore them apart on earth and are having a good time in Heaven

5. What places did you visit?
Massachusetts and Rhode Island! I went home and it was AMAZING

6. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?
Time with Doc, he was gone so much in 09 but it isn't looking like 2010 will be much different

7. What dates from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
May 26th, it's the day I took my pregnancy test

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
creating life...not too shabby haha

9. What was your biggest failure?
this job, I should have left months ago when things got bad but I wanted to be a loyal employee...I am still disappointed in myself.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
I had my wisdom teeth out and that was like being sick for 3 weeks straight. I fell a bunch of times but nothing more major than that.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
Crib, it made it seem real

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Moses, my dog seems to finally be getting the handle on Doc coming and going like he does, this deployment he hasn't pulled any of his usual stunts

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
My mother's, the was she reacted when I told her I was pregnant will forever be with me. Also my FIL who after what seemed to finally be a honest climb back onto the wagon has fallen back off again. Both alcoholics, I don't know why I ever had faith in either of them.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Bills...disposable income into baby stuff

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Doc's home coming and TTC and then after that the positive pregnancy test, I ran around my house like a crazy woman.

16. What song will always remind you of 2009?
Good Girls Go Bad and you can thank Doc for that one...

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder?
Happier! We are starting a new life together as parents, there is nothing more exciting than that!
b) thinner or fatter? hahaha MUCH fatter but I have good reason
c) richer or poorer? Richer but only because we are saving for my time out of work

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Worked, being cut to 4 days a week for that length of time sucked

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Worrying, I have to trust in His plan

20. How did you spend Christmas in 2009?
Here in WA with my sister and BIL

21. Did you fall in love in 2009?
From the moment I knew I was pregnant

22. What was your favorite TV program?
The Office

23. What did you do for your birthday in 2009?
Doc bought me an ice cream cake, it was about 100 degrees out so it couldn't have been more perfect

24. What was the best book you read?
I only read one book in its entirety this year and it was Remember Me? by Sophie Kinsella, her books are so fun

25. What did you want and get?
pregnant

26. What did you want and not get?
a boy...but don't worry I am not at all disappointed to be having a girl

27. What was your favorite film of this year?
The Hangover but I don't think I would call that a "film"

28. Did you make some new friends this year?
I did, some great wives from battalion

29.What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Spending more time with Doc

30. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?
Elastic wast bands...I miss zippers

31. What kept you sane?
Necessity, one of is has to be :)

32. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Ugh non - I am not impressed by those people

33. What political issue stirred you the most?
Health Care and the Afghan surge. Nothing worse than listening to people who know nothing about either try to argue one side over the other.

34. Who did you miss?
Everything about home but that's no different than any year

35. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009.
Life is not nearly as complicated as it's made out to be. Do what makes you happy while being mindful of others and you really can't go wrong.

Going to party like it's 2009!

I have big plans for tomorrow night, I might even make it until midnight! I see me ringing in the New Year with my critters and my Harvest Moon game (which I pretty much beat last night...completed the main quest - so I am pretty cool). I hope it doesn't sound like I am complaining because I am pretty excited about these plans, there was no way I was going to do any driving tomorrow night.

Tomorrow is the last day of 2009 - what a year it was. I spent more than half the year without Doc between the 2 deployments and the 5-6 (maybe more?) TDYs but that is not what I will think about when I look back on this year. How amazing is it that Doc and I got pregnant on our first try (well I am the pregnant one but couldn't have done it without him)? We've been so blessed. Just 10 months ago we had one foot out the door ready to PCS to TN! Thank God we didn't go, I can't imagine what life would have been like - we wouldn't be expecting our first in 2010 that's for sure.

It was also a wonderful year for our marriage, we've never been closer. We've really been able to communicate on a new level, it's amazing.

I am sure 2010 is going to be a blur, Doc will be home very soon thanks to having friends in high places :) and as soon as he's here it's going to be all pineapple, spicy food, foot rubs and whatever else I need to do to get this baby here. (I know, sex is what everyone suggests but Doc has a hard time with because his daughter is in there - weirdo). Once she's here I am a mom. That's it, I am losing my job so I guess I will technically be a SAHM for a little while anyway. Wow. If you would have told that to the girl in the picture I posted yesterday she would have laughed in your face but I'm going to tell you guys something as long as you promise not to tell - I'm pretty excited about it.

This is going to sound bad but...

...I am reading textfromlastnight.com and laughing my ass off (hey it's a slow week at work). The sad thing is many of them sound a lot like my friends and I could have written them in college (not the really nasty ones or drug related texts). Is it bad to admit that we partied hard in college? I am just glad the most social media we had was AIM and all those conversations are long gone - who knows what kind of updates would have ended up on Facebook. Hell, even texting was a new thing then. I will just have to remember to hide those photo albums when TC gets a little older.

Have you lost a little respect for me? If so I'm OK with it, college was a great time and I managed to leave that place with my liver intact and an amazing edumacation.

Starting off senior year with a power hour, I'm the hooker in the tube top!

holiday recap

My sister and BIL left super early Saturday which was just enough time. They arrived Wednesday afternoon and we went to Seattle to walk around the market and I think I did pretty well, 2 hours of walking and by the time we were done I was almost in tears but I didn't let on. My new stretch marks were helping hold my belly up through the pain. We got to my house and we ordered pizza and watch The Proposal - surprisingly funny!

The next day was Christmas Eve, we went to the PX and the auto part store (I had a headlight out - yuck!) when we got back D and I started baking. We made a pineapple upside down cake and some cookies, BIL looked bored so we sent him to Target. He came back and changed my broken headlight and fixed something in the bathroom, it was very nice of him. We ate our ham dinner around 5 and watched Elf. Doc called me which made me very happy, it was already Christmas where he is. I asked if they were doing anything special and he said they wanted to put on a Christmas pageant but didn't have time...I would have paid good money to see that. The things they do to entertain themselves.

Christmas morning was like any other, well except that we had dough boys (fried dough) for breakfast. A family tradition, I still have vivid memories of my dad standing over a pot of melted lard (I used veggie oil which I am sure is why they weren't as good). Then we exchanged gifts, I got D a book and as a joke a Bump It and I got BIL a used xBox game (the hockey game Doc is addicted to) and a portable urinal I found at the auto parts store - it was a big hit. They gave me a few books and TC got a sleeper. We spent the rest of the day vegging, we decided not to go to the movies and opted for Denny's instead. I think they had a good time and it was nice to not spend the day all alone. If BIL was pissed about anything he didn't let on to me.

I spent the next 2 days playing way too much Harvest Moon - it was fantastic.

4 years ago today...

Surrounded by 27 members of our family and friends we said "I do." Just about 4 months after we met we made it forever. I wouldn't change a thing about that day.

merry christmas

It's already Christmas for most of you, I hope you have a wonderful day. I am going to do my best to enjoy tomorrow with D and the BIL but I miss DH so much it hurts.

Now it's just a countdown to 2010, it's going to be a great year.

deep breaths

I really wish my sister had better sense than to tell me about all of the temper tantrums her husband has been throwing about coming out here for Christmas. I know she doesn't know how stressed out I am on a daily basis with just Doc being gone and dealing with the final month of pregnancy so it might not seem like a lot to her.

When I have a guest I like to keep them happy, entertained, and comfortable. With the way BIL is acting I don't know if he'll be any of those things. I have been super stressed making sure the house is clean, all I have left to do tonight is dust away some cobwebs (yup, it's been that long) and tidy up. I really don't want there to be anything extra that he can complain about to my sister.

It's all coming to a head this morning. I am having one of my oh-so-fun prolonged panic attacks. Well it's not really a full on attack more of slow releasing anxiety that will keep my heart rate well over 110 for most of the day. Breathing is not easy either, I am doing my best to channel the yoga techniques I've learned to try to get it under control but that's just making my nose run. This could last all day of be gone in 5 minutes, I am just nervous about what it could do to the baby.

I would just hate to make it this far without meds and have to go on them now. I want nothing more than to be able to exclusively breast feed for the first few months and medication may not allow that.

Is it January yet?

Things that are not fun to do while 8 months pregnant

It's me! Now here's a list of things I did this weekend that in normal life I don't think twice about but in pregnant life become a bigger chore:

- give the 70lb dog a bath, he hates baths

- wrestle with fitted sheets after a few too many spins in the dryer

- return a bar height chair to the store without a shopping cart (the over the head carry worked best)

- pick anything off the floor

- mop

- try to sleep

- buy beer, people tend to stare

- read blogs that I can't see in google reader, OK I hate this one all the time. I've been considering unfollowing blogs that make me click to the main page.

missing him

A little over a month ago Doc said "I can't wait until TC is old enough to have an Easy Bake Oven so she can make me delicious treats."

I don't remember if I shared that already but it keeps putting a smile on my face today.

unemployed

Not yet but soon. I had a chat with my boss this morning just to get a clear idea about where my position here stood. In my meeting last month while discussing my salary she kept saying that my job was secure "until I had the baby" which I didn't question at the time. It seemed like a weird thing to say but there were other things on my mind.

As you know I have not wanted to come back to this job after I take time off with the baby but I was keeping it as an option. I was just picturing the worst happening, I would find childcare for TC, prepay, come back to work and get let go. Now it will work out that I will be let go right before I have the baby and will be eligible for unemployment. Good for me that I can work up until that happens and good for them that I can put together some Valentines Day promotions. That with my Aflac will make things a lot easier on Doc and me.

I know it sounds like a weird thing to say but I really think this is the best for everyone, this company does not have the money to invest in the marketing needed to make my position necessary and I need to take time off anyway. My boss also let me know that she will give me a great letter of rec. and if she sees anything that she thinks I may be a good fit for she will send it my way.

I don't know what I want to do about work after the baby comes. Doc and I decide that together in a few months but right now I just feel so blessed that things are coming together for us. Now I just need him to call so I can let him know!

this is why I love him

I know I pick on Doc a lot but the bottom line is that we love each other and we are deliriously happy. He called and gave me some amazing news which he followed with "I just want to be home holding our little baby" but by the sounds of it he will have to wait a little bit after he gets home to do so.

I guess Doc is no longer disconnected from all this baby stuff.

They say "a woman becomes a mother at conception, a man becomes a father at the birth" well it seems that they are not part of a military family because while a motherhood may start at conception fatherhood sometimes starts with a deployment.

a good night

Doc made a joke om the phone for the first time since he left.

People are looking out for us, everything is being done to get him home to TC and me as soon as possible.

Bills are paid and there is a good amount left over.

Can't hate an evening like this.

(I just hope it was a joke and he isn't planning on bringing those salmon packets home, I sent them over there so they would never stink up my house again!)

weekend in review

I bought a diaper bag this weekend, it's shipping USPS so I am not exactly sure when I will have it but I am already in love with it. (Sick I know). I did register for one at Target and received two of them at my shower but the more I thought about it the more I really wanted a pretty one. So this is what I got:
It's kind of huge but it will fit everything I need. It's black and white which matches my stroller now I just need a new wallet to match. Here is how I justify the $140 price tag:

1. I haven't purchased a bag for less than $175 in over 5 years and this is one I will be carrying for quite some time
2. I found a 15% off coupon bringing the price to $114
3. free shipping (speaks for itself)
   
4. I returned the target bag which gave me around $40 so I can just take that off the total making the bag $74 out of pocket
5. because I really wanted it!
   

So that made me happy this weekend. I also got a lot accomplished, finally unpacked the office at our house. All of our books are put away and I think I might reread Catcher in the Rye for fun. I still need to do some organizing and pick up an air mattress but other than that I am almost ready for my sister & BIL's visit.

My friend Laura had a Pampered Chef party and I picked up a few things I needed there too, I don't miss selling that stuff but I do miss earning loads of free product! The consultant told us the host offer for Feb and it's 60% off of the cook wear set and the knife block set, 2 things Doc and I need desperately but Feb is going to be a busy month for us so I guess I will have to sit that one out (but if you are interested I would contact a local consultant - you just need a show of $500 or more - I think).

Sunday I watch the Patriots win in ugly fashion but a win is a win. After that it was off to Target for some returns and purchases. I got Teagan a closet organizer since we aren't doing a dresser, some green frames for her room to add more green accents, some clothes and a few other things. I also picked up a bottle of bubbly for me (the peach nonalcoholic kind, I think I may pop that open tonight for fun).

Doc called on Sat and we were able to talk for 9 minutes, this is much different than the other trips, his time online is almost nothing and phone calls are few and far between. I am not complaining because I cherish every second I can communicate with him it's just taking some getting used to. It gives me the chance to send him some snail mail which I really haven't done since BCT.

That's pretty much it. Oh check out this song (I haven't watched this particular video) but this song had me crying like a baby yesterday...I should stay away from country radio.

Just what I needed

I spoke to my sister last night and she told me that her husband suggested that they use one of the ticket vouchers that they won to fly me home for Christmas and then use the other for D to come visit after the baby is born. If flying home for Christmas was a real option I would have booked the ticket months ago.

I know it's hard for him to be away from home on Christmas and when I was home and D suggested they come visit for Christmas I told her that I would never ask her husband to give up his Christmas for me and she said that he would have to suck it up. D's husband is not really the best when it comes to sucking it up - the first word that comes to mind when I think about him starts with a "p" and can be very offensive to some people but that's the way he's always been. He doesn't get his way he pitches a fit. We get along because he's not always like that and he does have moments where he's a good guy but he's not someone I would choose to have in my innermost circle.

I told D last night that I don't think my doctor would be OK with me flying across the country at this point in my pregnancy (and I know DH wouldn't be). That plus I would have to board my dog and those arrangements need to be made months in advance for the holidays. And I am not going to lie, I want to be in my home on Christmas which I don't think is asking too much. This is where I share a life with my husband and being here, in our bed, makes me feel closer to him.

D called me a few minutes ago and told me that B actually went online last night and told her that pregnant woman can fly until they are 36 weeks! He seriously did research?! I told her that I would he fine if they wanted to just fly out another time - I had been expecting to spend Christmas alone anyway. She said no way and they were coming and he was going to deal. Great, I just hope he doesn't take it out on her (no he would never get physical he just acts like a brat).

So here I am, stressed out. It was never my intention to ruin his Christmas just so I could have a nice one. That and, I don't like to throw this around too much, but my husband is willing to make the ultimate sacrifice for the sake of this country and B can't even come west for one Christmas (with his wife) so that I am not alone while my husband is at war?!

And that is why he is "the P word"

I've been quiet

I'm having a hard time, at work I'm good at putting on a happy face and my friends and family all think I am fine but inside I am broken. I want him home and I think I am starting to resent TC. Isn't that horrible? Our amazing daughter who is doing nothing more than hanging out and growing strong before she makes her entrance into this world. Pregnant or not Doc would be away so resenting her is totally ridiculous. I love her but I am sick and tired of being pregnant.

Is it Feb yet?

The day he left, Moses almost cooperated.

My tree

32 weeks pic yesterday

sad day

I saw hundreds of police cars on the way to work, south of McChord AFB they took over the left lane, lights on sirens off. North of McChord they were lined up by the mile waiting to be staged for the 2000+ car processional.

On November 29th 4 police officers were gunned down at a coffee shop before starting their shift. Sgt. Mark Renninger, and officers Tina Griswold, Ronald Owens and Greg Richards will not be forgotten. I feel a connection to law enforcement spouses, when our loved ones are out we fear an unexpected knock on the door. We feel pride in what our loved ones have chosen to do but we don't seek out any special recognition for it. We love everyday heroes.

I can't even begin to imagine what it's been like for these four families all I can do is pray for them and ask you to do the same. If you would like to see some moving images from today I suggest checking out MSNBC's article the slide show does a good job capturing the emotion of the day.

To my police wife followers, thank you for what you do. The daily risks your husbands take may seem to go unnoticed and unappreciated but I really do appreciate it and not just in the wake of this tragedy. Stay strong.

I guess I am never really alone these days

Doc left over the weekend. This goodbye was the hardest one ever even though I know they are going to do everything they can to get him home in time for me to give birth but I just didn't want to let him go. He was all over the place too, very anxious to go which is so not like him. He wants nothing more than to be here if I need him, like getting my flat rate boxes down from the top shelf in the garage. He knows I have people here who will help me if I need anything but he wants it to be him.

Before he left there was a bit of drama. He wasn't on the December promotion list which sucked but I guess his ERB wasn't up to date and everyone was on leave the last 2 weeks of Nov so there wasn't much he could do about that. He's been working with the S1 guys to get everything squared away for Jan. He called the S1 on Friday and the guy in there told him that "some guy" came in and told him to stop working on Doc's promotion. We knew right away who that was, Doc's old boss who happens to now be the boss of all the medics in this battalion, unfortunately for him he's only and E6. So this guy, who's life is so miserable he can't stand to see others do well, took it upon himself to try to stop my husband's promotion...you know the one he already passed the board for. In his mind his spot as Bat. Sr. Medic made him think that he could trump a master sgt as well as the commanding officers. And his reason, because Doc hasn't been to the training that most of these guys go to before getting their E5 - hey douche bag, you're the one who keeps holding him back!!! Bottom line, we got it figured out and he should be on the Jan list (looks like I'll be buying the Army Times).

I just pray that this guy doesn't decide to take whatever he's got coming to him for pulling this stunt out on Doc.

Other than that it was business as usual until it was time to actually drop him off. As I've mentioned before we don't do the big deployment ceremony it's a "OK see you later type" type thing. As I am getting ready to leave when he realizes that he doesn't have a uniform after all so I had to drive back to the house and pick that up - so our good bye turned into two goodbyes. After I dropped that off I stated driving away, crying, when I realize he has his phone on him still and that would get him in HUGE trouble so I called him and told him I was on my way back. So that was goodbye number three. Driving away that time I was OK until I heard our song on the radio (we like to take whatever song is ridiculous and make that our song for a while - this one is better than The Whisper Song which was our first). Anyway, here it is for your listening and viewing pleasure, I think the video really makes it great.

We won!!!

After a great night last night I woke up to amazing news...WE WON! My sister and her husband are coming to WA for Christmas!!!! Thank you so much Cat Country I can't even begin to express my gratitude!

sketchy McSketcherson...

I met a woman a few days ago who runs a home business, we hit it off and she took my number to discuss me possibly doing the same. I would LOVE to work from home for a few years but I am not going to jump into business with just anyone. She called today and wanted her and her husband to get together with me and Doc to discuss. I let her know that time was limited due to the impending exotic vacation and apparently if Doc can't be there it's a no go. WTF is that? Yea, even if it's only 10 minutes I am not wasting precious time with him. Furthermore, he has never had a say in what I do for work (and he doesn't want one) and I have NEVER had to explain myself to him so what's the deal?

So looks like I wont be working with them...I wonder if perhaps they were swingers looking to expand (some people like pregnant woman). OK that is very unlikely and rather creepy but either way the whole thing is just sketchy and I am glad that I know now!

ugh

I am pretty sure that all of my customers know that I am not in a good mood today and they are banding together to really piss me off. Either that or people are just getting stupider and I am the lucky one who gets to deal with them. It's not even 10AM and I've stopped pretending to be nice to people.

7PM can not come fast enough, dinner at The Melting Pot with Doc & another couple and then I am taking tomorrow OFF!

my cat

Thinks I am spoiling her, no Princess I am not buying all this stuff for you - it's for the baby!

Oh and FYI radio host - when you are playing songs like "O Holy Night" you are playing Christmas music, not holiday music. This overly PC crap is making me want to throw my radio through a window.

40 Days

I have 40 more working days left if all goes as planned. I think I can last for 40 days....I hope. More annoying crap when down today but I really don't even want to get into it because it will just make me mad again. I really wish I could call this place out by name after I'm gone so everyone could know what d-bags they are but that's just not how I roll.

My sister entered a contest with the local country station for plane tickets over Christmas for her and her husband to visit her "too pregnant to fly army wife sister who will be all alone since her husband is on his 3rd tour." We will see, I really hope they win, it would be so much fun to have a Christmas with my sister again.

As promised, pictures of the nursery. Give it to me straight what do I need to do? I bought this chair and matching ottoman to go in th corner where the half set up bouncy seat is then I am thinking of putting the changing table under the window or...I don't know. Ugh! I need a green hamper and some green wall hanging to tie it all together - I guess I should check out some esty shops.

I broke it

A friend of mine was sweet enough to get me this beautiful bouncer at my baby shower:
And I was stupid enough to put it together wrong. I stuck one of those metal things in the wrong hole and the end of the medal this ended up stuck in that hole. I was not happy, Doc of course thought it was hilarious and my pouting was pretty cute. I did come up with a plan though, I decided to call the company and tell them that the piece that the medal thing is stuck in came broken so they would send a replacement part and it totally worked! It's only a half lie because it is broken but it didn't come that way. I blame it on the instructions :)

Doc was wondering why we even need a bouncy seat...he still doesn't think I need a chair in the nursery! So far I haven't bought one and I will see how it goes without one but I think one will end up in there eventually. I cleaned the room up over the weekend and I've decided that I don't love it - I will be going with a changing table which I originally didn't want but I need it to balance out the room. I have a green shelf in there and now I need more green accessories for the rest of the room. I also took down the mobile - it was ugly. When she's actually sleeping in there I might put it back up but I'm not sure. I will take pictures tonight and post them tomorrow, maybe some of my wonderful readers will have some great suggestions (on the cheap) to really make the room come together.

11 little piggies

Yesterday I took my friend out for spa pedicures as a thank you for my baby shower and it was exactly what we both needed. After being on my feet making dinner my feet were still bothering me (calling them piggies must have come after seeing a preggo's swollen toes). I've been to this spa several times and I love everyone there, I wish I could update some of the decor, some small changes would go a long way but other than that it's great. If you are ever in Puyallup, WA and need a place to get pampered try Chardonnay Day Spa (and no, they didn't offer me anything to say that - but if they see that and want to give me a free pedi I won't object haha). Over an hour of foot pampering is so much better then you're 7 months pregnant - if it wasn't so expensive I would be there every month.

We also did a little shopping before and I got TC her very own little piggy, a piggy bank. It's so cute I couldn't resist.
I had a beautiful hand painted porcelain piggy bank growing up and I loved it, I cried like a baby when my oldest sister broke it in half and took all of my money to buy cigarettes...this one has a plug in the belly so if Auntie Faith does visit and needs a few bucks for smokes this little piggies legs will all stay intact.

In other news, everything Doc and I do is very annoying to the other...just another sign that his next trip is very soon.

ugh

I worked my ass off today and made one hell of a feast for Doc and me.

This became this:
Which I carved into this:
And we adding this plate to the rest
Turkey, cran-apple chutney, maple pecan sweet potatoes. candied carrots, mashed potatoes, and apple pie (not pictured my amazing pan gravy)

Close up, it was all amazing (doc said the turkey was a little dry but I disagree) Nothing green, I was going to make green beans but Doc thought we had enough, I guess he was right.

I hope everyone is enjoying the holiday, if you are able to be with the ones you love hold them extra close and if you are celebrating while a loved one is far far away, my thoughts are with you.

Happy Thanksgiving!