yee-haw bluegrass!

Doc is a man with many dreams, every day it's something new. He's good at what he does so he has a lot of doors open for him and he just needs pick one and go through it. The latest idea would bring us closer to the east coast, Ft. Campbell to be exact. It's not my home but it is my mother's home! My mom and stepfather moved there in 2002 and my sister and her kids moved there in 2006, how cool would it be for Doc and I to move there?

My mom and I have an interesting relationship, my father raised my sisters and me and my mom is an alcoholic. She was recovering for 12 years but has since jumped head first off the wagon. She's functional and has a nice life for herself but I could see it being a problem when it comes to what I want to subject my children to.

What would really be great is to be around my niece, she's 15 years old and could really use another female remodel. My sister is a great mother but she is also my niece's best friend and I am not sure if that is always the best combination. At 15 years old she's sexually active, my sister does have her on the pill which is great but I would much rather her still be a kid. When I was 15 the thought of sex scared me to death (literally - my aunt died of AIDS) but my mom and my sister were both pregnant in their teens, they were unmarried and are still struggling. We all want more for my niece. I know she wants to go to college and get out of Kentucky but no one around her has done it and it would be so easy for her to just give up.

Not that I am super woman or anything but I've gone to college, no, I've sent myself to college. I've had some amazing jobs and made something of myself. And I've done it all without any hoochie shots on MySpace!! If I was in her daily life maybe she would see that she can do it all, and still have fun. I don't want to change her or push her into college if it's not really what she wants but I want her to know that she has options and that she is worth a lot more than she's giving her self credit for.

So obviously, I think the move to Ft. Campbell would be great. Oh and we wold live in TN, be an hour from Nashville (FUN) and we could afford to buy a house there. But who knows, I may get a phone call tonight with yet another possible destination.

thirsty thirsty hippo

I just got home from a dive bar that I went to with a few friends, I had a Sam Adams (what else) and almost a black eye!

When I say this is a dive bar I mean it is a D-I-V-E, there was one martini glass in the whole joint and it was that glass that got me in trouble. A group of "ladies" (the quotation marks aren't to imply that they were actually dudes but just to say that they were female - their acting like ladies remains to be seen) comes in and one of them orders a cosmo and insists it's in a martini glass. I don't know about you guys but I hate martini glasses in a crowded bar because they always spill.

Anyway, I was telling a hilarious story about a college friend who thought she was on a toilet but was really on some dude's computer chair after a wild night, well the story goes that she was looking for the lever to flush the "toilet" but you have to do the grandiose drunk girl hand movements which I was doing right as little miss cosmo was walking by. Her drink ended up on her shirt. I didn't let her see but I did laugh a little when she peeled the lime off of her chest - seriously, drink it out of a normal glass like the rest of us.

Have you ever watched the discovery channel and seen a hippo get angry when someone is in his way? That is what this was like. I, of course, apologized profusely (I am far too cute to be hit in the face) and she gathered herself and pretended it was OK. Phew! I swear that for a moment I was scared, while I obviously do not have too much class to go to a dive bar I do have too much class to fight in one (well that plus the fact that she would have killed me!).

And I thought I wouldn't have anything to blog about today....

"cool, 3 day weekends"

Doc is the most amazing man. I was finally able to "talk" to him last night over IM and let him know what has been going on in my world. When I broke the news that my hours had been cut his reaction was "cool, 3 day weekend." That was it, no panic over money or anything. He's excited that we'll have a little more time together when he gets back. How cute is he?

He mention that we could move to the air force base if we wanted to. I guess since the army post and AF base are pretty much attached we could get housing on either one. We have always said that we will do everything in our power to not live on an army post but the AF base is really nice, I may have to drive around the neighborhoods soon. When I called housing today I realized that we will have to wait to put our names on the waiting list because his rank should be jumping up and if we apply for housing while I am pregnant we will qualify for a bigger place. That and we are locked into our lease until September.

I am not sure that we would save money on base but we really want to get out of the apartment life. There are a few prerequisites though, we want a free standing home or duplex, no neighbors on top or below us. We want a yard where we can rent a fence so Moses will have his own place to play, a basement would be great but it's not essential. We have looked into renting a house off post but all the safe neighborhoods seem to be out of our price range. It could be exciting, other than message boards and blogs I haven't really felt a part of this military life.

Here are a few news tid-bits from the day:

I finally signed up for a yoga for beginners class, it's once a week for 6 weeks and starts in April. After that I am excited to do some real (non-wii fit) yoga and eventually prenatal yoga!!

Two members of our three man sales team were let go today...granted they sucked at what they did for the most part, but still! So now we are down to one guy (my boss's fiance) who just started here in January and 2 new hires...I guess the company has decided to go all in - let's hope it pays off.

Now I have all weekend to decide what to do with my Monday...any suggestions?

i choose my choice!

I am going to try to choose to be happy. There are so many things in life that are beyond our control and that sucks but what I think defines your character is how you choose to deal with things. So now I have Monday's off, that's fine for now. I am looking for something else, but until that happens I will make the most of my extra day.

I look around and it's hard not to smile, the cherry blossoms are starting to bloom and the tress are budding! How is it already spring? I am not complaining at all, I am excited to put the winter behind me. There are so many amazing things about spring:

- obviously Baseball!
- the dog park
- the newly discovered (by me) river bike path
- farmer's market opens down town!
- ice cream (which I eat all year round but shhhhhh)
- fun weekend skirts
-flip flops & pedicures (you can't have one without the other)
- a cold beer under the warm sun
- daylight that extends way into the evening
- on yea, a little thing we call homecoming!

With all those things to be happy about I am not going to let the economy's role in my job situation hold me back. Now I have an extra day a week to enjoy all these things! It will take a bit of a budget shuffle but we will survive, we have made it through worse.

And a little note for my anonymous commenter, thank you. (learning to take a compliment - that makes me happy).

this is so not cool

I just got out of a meeting with the bosses and 5 of my coworkers. Obviously something was up and it's not really their style to do a group lay off but I think what they did was worse. The are cutting a day from each of us! I am so pissed I am shaking. Just lay me off if that is what you want to do! Let me be free to find something else.

They wanted to eliminate 40 hours a week from the payroll so instead of getting rid of the one dead weight employee (everyone knows who she is) we all have to suffer. The HR guy told me yesterday that only one manager wanted to keep that employee and she being the owner's daughter, got her way.

I can't very well go say, "I'd rather be laid off" because I am sure they would fire me and fight me on unemployment benefits but the truth is I would! I could take one for the team, I don't need the health insurance and I could survive until I found a new job but some of my coworkers affected are already having trouble making ends meet.

This is such shit. I guess I really do need that $250.

give me my $250! and other tid bits from the day

First of all, let me just say that it is crap that we have to wait 30 for Family Separation Allowance to kick in when the boys deploy but that's not really my issue, after those 30 days I want to get it! Really what is the excuse not to, they had an extra 30 days to put it in the system. I know, $250 is not going to break the bank (but it will get me another Coach bag at the PX...must....resist....) it's just the principle. Now I have to call finance and make sure that they are aware (and I am sure they are). I don't know any other job where people have to fight to get the correct pay, if it was the first time then whatever but we have had about 7 pay mistakes in our 3.5 years in. OK I am done complaining.

In crazy dog mother news...Moses ate a grape last night, it fell on the floor and he ate it. I didn't think much of it until a co-worker told me that dogs can't eat grapes or raisins so I did some researching and it's true!! I went home over my lunch break and he was just fine but I was still a bit concerned so I called the vet. I am sure they deal with a lot of crazy dog people but still I felt silly asking if one grape is going to harm my 70 pound dog. They said he should be OK but I need to keep an eye on him.

How did I not know that dogs can't have grapes? It's a fruit! I am not a big fan of giving him people food, we spend to much on his dog food to fatten him up with table scraps but if something falls on the floor it's usually fair game (that is the only time he's allowed in the kitchen). He's a big fan of cheese and comes running whenever he hears a Kraft singles wrapper open but I'm OK with that, it it weren't for cheese he would never take pills.

And my final thought for the post - damn you iced tea! I have been drinking Crystal Light like it's my job because I hate plain water. I try to drink a gallon of it between 8-5 while I am at work - well you can imagine how often I have to pee! This morning I went to the ladies room with my phone in my pocket (on vibrate since I am at the office and they don't want to hear Drop Kick Murphy's when I get a call) I return to my desk to find that I have a new voice mail, WTF, I didn't feel it go off. When your pants are around your ankles you aren't going to feel your phone vibrate. Sure enough it was DH...he left a message "hey, I guess I will try to call you later or something. Alright, I love you - bye." Boo-hoo fist missed call of this rotation.

I am sick of calling him "DH" in real life I never say dear husband...I think from now on I will call him Doc.

there is no saving them...

My wellies have served me well in my 19 months in Washington but I am afraid it's over. What started as a crack has now become a hole and they need to be replaced.
I don't know if you can see it but that's where the hole is! So sad. I am tempted to go get some Coach boots to help ease the pain but I wont...I can't imagine spending $118 on something I wear primarily to walk in mud (and the occasional puppy pile - not mine of course I ALWAYS clean up after Moses!) Anyway, it's a sad, sad day. Even DH loved them:
I almost had to cut his big feet out of them that night!

In other news, I am just so blah about my lack of weight loss. I told DH that I was fat when he left I will be fat when he gets back and he said that he really doesn't care as long as I am working out. I thought that was really sweet, he just wants me to be healthy but I want to be skinny again damn it! I know it's very old school of me but I really think that a man who's job relies so much on him being in shape deserves a wife who is in shape.

The alarm is going to go off at 5AM and I am going to get up and do my best, maybe once the Celexa is out of my system I will be back to normal, weight gain is a possible side effect and when I was skinny last year when DH came home I was not on it...I can't believe this is me less than a year ago:
The pity party is over! I promise next time I will back to my delightful self :)

drugs, work and driving

I have been trying to kick Celexa for a month and I really don't think I am making any progress. I am on it for anxiety but since I want to get all knocked up I am coming off of it. I am doing half a pill every 3-4 days but on the last day it's hell. Perhaps I am just trying to come off too quickly but I just want to be done with it. In case you're wondering the anxiety is back, I didn't hear from DH all day on Saturday and by bed time I was planning his funeral. I just need to talk myself out of it when these things happen. Panic attacks are the worst, it's like a heart attack mixed with a head attack!

Now for work, I had my meeting with that boss I mentioned on Friday and he didn't fire me he was talking to me about joining the sales staff. I told him that I have never done sales but I am willing to try anything, I think I could be good at it. I mentioned that I should take the BJ's Wholesale Club and CVS accounts so I can go home on the company's dime and he mentioned that if this works out it could be something I could move to the east coast with. We'll see, he said it would be a slow learning process which is fine with me, I am still not sure that I want to stay there.

And finally, driving. A few weeks ago I got my driver's license! Yes I had mentioned that my old Rhode Island license was just a little expired (ok it expired in August 2007) and Washington state law says if you let your license expire you need to retake the test unless you are military. I am obviously not active duty military so I started to study for my test (it's been 12 years since driver's ed) and I went on down the the department of licensing. I should have known it would be a good day, when I sat down the guy in front of me had accidental grabbed 2 tickets and he gave the extra one to me. So in no time my new number was called and the woman had no idea what the RI laws regarding military spouses so there was no test required. I was soooooo excited, I couldn't stop smiling that whole day because I don't think I would have done well on the test.

I'm Kreativ

I've been tagged! Amy from The Undomesticated Army Wife thinks I am pretty spiffy! This is my first time getting one of these so this is for sure a gold star day (wow, spiffy & gold star when did I become a dork?). Oh and she used pictures which I thought was fun so I will too.

Here are the award rules:
List 7 things that you love, and then pass the award on to 7 bloggers that you love! Be sure to tag them and let them know that they have won. You can copy the picture of the award and paste it on your sideboard letting the whole world know...you are Kreativ!

1) My dear husband, he is my rock. While I am sure I could had survived had we never met I know life would not have been nearly as exciting!
2) My critters, they are amazing and having them to hang out with keeps me sane!
To see why you must watch this video

3) My siblings, be they step or half it doesn't matter, we are one big 'ol family and I don't know what I would do without them! (oh and my pocket sized grandmother who's in this pic too!) (oh and I know I've used this one before but this is the last one taken of all of us together - Christmas 2003)

4) My friends


5) My in-laws, they have accepted me into the family since day one which I know wasn't easy since they had just lost my SIL and DH and I had only dated for 3 months...now they are wonderful and always make sure that we are OK and happy!

My grandmother-in-law who is almost as pocket sized as my real grandmother!

My SIL and grandfather-in-law. Don't you love that the Major always has a pen and pad in his pocket? That's what 20 years of army life will do!

6) Boston Red Sox Baseball (duh)

DH and me at a game last year...I love my summer time freckles (but not enough to put on this list)!

7) My car! I may be the youngest person driving a Santa Fe but I don't care! It's cute, it's safe, it's big enough for Moses and a few car seats (when the time comes) and it has more balls than you would expect! It was my first band new car after a LONG list of shit boxes, I can't believe it's almost time for her 30,000 mile service...

And now my seven bloggers:

1) My oldest (in years together - not that she's old) friend and owner of working mom's tirade

2) My girls Cheryl, we met on MySpace and since have become great friends - she even introduced me to my favorite Washington wine! You can find her over at Cinchouse.com's Wife of a Wounded Soldier

3) A true inspiration not just for her strength but her ability to be so open and honest about her experiences Karie owner of Wife of a Wounded Marine

4) One of my first followers (hmmmm that's very cult like - if I start handing out Nikes and Kool-Aid run!) Sam over at Little Blessings, I love hearing about how crazy life can be with 3 young children and one on the way! I am sure I will be asking all sorts of questions when it's my turn!

5) Another O.G. is Teresa Leigh at Sweet Goodness, the mother of a beautiful 5 month old baby boy who(m?) she's always got great stories about, but it's really the pictures that make your heart melt!

6 & 7...I don't really know - most of the blogs I follow already got this and the others are a little more serious :( I guess I need more blog buddies.

i do wear a red coat

It would seem that the boys over there love me, maybe more than DH does! I got a call at 9:30 this morning which was a great way to wake up, I don't think he's ever called me that early. We chatted a bit - 3 minutes and 46 blissful seconds to be exact. So I thought that was it for the day so I was stunned when he called back at 12:30, he just wanted to let me know that his latest package arrive...this is the big one - Resident Evil 5, some Tom Clancy game and his new watch. Yes Virginia there is a Santa it's she is the wife of a deployed soldier!

He said he had already played a few games which surprised me because it had only been 3 hours and he said that his buddies had been asking him every day if the package had arrived (why their wives aren't shelling out the $60 per game I have no idea) and DH told them that it didn't come with today's mail so a few of the guys hopped in a truck and drove down the the FOB post office and sure enough it was there.

How funny is that? So excited for my husband's care package...silly boys. I hate to disappoint them because this Santa is putting the sleigh in the garage, I've spent enough money sending him toys! Besides it wont be long now...we are over the hump and finally the countdown has more days passed than days left.

is it so wrong?

I am going to take a bubble bath (well first scrub my nasty tub then take a bath) and I very tempted to move my TV to the bathroom so I can play Wii from the tub. I wish these crazy ideas would stop popping into my head! I obviously cannot do that - can I?

No, no the TV is much to big to move all alone and the Wii controllers would not do well in water but maybe later I will write to Nintendo requesting waterproof remotes.

I am just killing time because I heard a rumor that the SUN(!) will be out today but it's still foggy and cold...I hate WA

someone stop me, i'm a blogging machine!

I am just trying to make the day go faster...37 minutes left (and I saw one of the owners in a closed door meeting with the HR guy so I am a little nervous that I am not safe for another week and I really don't want to think about it...). Anyway, I was looking at the Red Sox web store (I am in web marketing, I like to think of it as research) and I saw this:

OMG I have to have it! I know, I am not pregnant yet but seriously...if I get pregnant in May I will be....ummmm...4-5 months pregnant for the playoffs and I need to be wearing this when the Sox win the world series this year.

Help, I have baby brain!

Oh and did I tell you that I spent $378.20 on baseball tickets this year? That's 2 tickets for all 3 Sox games in Seattle...I hope DH doesn't blow a gasket when he finds out...but I'll be a chap date - he'll be home so I wont be drinking.

for fun

The day before D came to visit I had to take my poor pooch (Moses) to the vet. He has been throwing up for no good reason. DH wanted me to be sure that there was nothing physically wrong with him so $200 later we find out that there isn't. Odds are that he is just depressed because Daddy is gone. Last time Moses lashed out but eating shoes and my camera - it's a lot easier to clean up dog puke than to replace my shoes again!

The vet wanted to be safe so she put him on antibiotics and a dewormer. The antibiotics were easy just put some cheese around it and he'll eat it, the dewormer is another story! First of all it came in a plastic syringe and was told that it tastes like chalk so I had to shove it down his throat. Since D was over I had her take a video to show DH (you know, so he can see what a great fur-mommy I am). Here it is, I am surprised that dog doesn't hate me...oh and listen to my sister and you will here my real name! (gasp)

In work news, a big boss set up a meeting with my on Monday morning so it would seem I have survived another round of lay-offs (I hope) since they tend to do them on Friday afternoons.

In army news, DH is trying to come home 2 weeks early. He learned that he has a 3rd class that he needs to go to while he's home! So a few weeks after he gets home it will be off to Bragg for 2 weeks of med training then off to GA for the 3-4 month long school that he HAS to do to get his E5 and then a month in Atlanta for hospital trauma rotations. So do the math...2 weeks + 4 months + 1 month = 5.5 months of the 7 months before his next rotation over seas that he will be away...we are never going to get pregnant.

i hope you like seeing my face...

...because D pretty much has the same one :). Here are some pics from her time here.

Cheesing out at Chop Stix

You can really see them but these are all the pirates

Lemon drops, always a good idea!

Heaven is being surrounded by wine...I look kinda pissed

A crapper...part of Seattle's great history

Going out for St. Patrick's Day

Finally, looking our finest at the airport before she hopped on the red eye.

5 whole days...it's long...

It was so amazing to see D, of course I cried a little at the airport but so did she. Then I almost cried again with excitement when I saw the Dunkin Donuts bag in her hand! No vanilla creme filled but she did have a Boston Creme and that was the perfect snack while waiting for her luggage.

It was as if no time had passed, that is the great thing about sisters, miles and years can separate you but when all is said and done you are never to far away from the days of late night whispers. Unfortunately, when she called her husband after she landed he kept her on the phone for quite some time and that seemed to be the theme of the trip.

The next day was the Saturday after payday so I thought it was the perfect time to show her what life is really like for an army wife - yup the commissary! We drove down to Ft. Lewis and I gave her the car tour of the things I knew (which is not much really) then we went to the PX and the dreaded commissary. She was stunned at the prices of things, it's all so cheap. It was a pretty calm day there - we only had one person in front of us at the self check out. I later told a friend that we had gone and that it was not crowded at all and D pipes in with, "are you kidding I felt like I was being knocked over!" I guess she doesn't realize that we wives are pretty rough and tumble too!

That night we went to the local piano bar, which I usually love but it was just so-so...until the pirates showed up. Seriously, there were about 25 people in full on pirate garb and for no reason other than what could only be described as a pirate bar hop. They were entertaining so I am glad they were there. Other than the pirates there were, as always, several birthday parties D was in the ladies room on of the party guests came up to me and said, "I am 74 years old and I have only said this to 2 people in my life, my late wife and you - I just want you to know that you are a beautiful girl and I didn't want to leave here tonight without telling you that." And then he went back to his party. It was one of the sweetest things anyone has ever said to me, he had no agenda and was not trying to picked me up for some sort of Freudian delight. I am assuming that I must look a lot like his late wife did in her 20's and if that is the case I am happy to have been able to bring him back if only for a moment. All in all a good night.

The next day my friend from work came by and we all went to the Chateau St. Michelle winery for a tour and tasting. I love that place (thanks Cheryl for introducing it to me) we all decided that the Muscat is their best so we each picked up a bottle and went home. We spent the evening drinking wine and talking. It was perfect, like it would be if we lived closer together. D and her husband called/texted about 15 times while we were there.

The next day (Monday) the 3 of us (we didn't scare my work friend off!) went to Seattle to be tourists. We did the underground tour which was very interesting, it seems that a lot of Seattle's history has to do with shit - for real! And really, it's no surprise because I happen to think this place is pretty shitty (hehe). Then we went to Pike Place so see some fish throwing and get some cheap produce and flowers. D and her husband called/texted about 45 times throughout the day.

Tuesday was St. Patrick's day, we're not Irish but we drink like we are. I took her to see where I work then to REI to get a watch for DH and then to the post office, it was nice to have someone to run errands with. I was a little bummed because DH tried to call and we kept getting cut off...the same time D had run off somewhere for her umpteenth call with her husband. That night I took her to a friend's neighborhood for some St. Patrick's Day drinks, I was glad she was able to meet another of my friends, I am sure she thinks my life is so sad and lonely out here. We weren't out late which was good because it was day 4 and I was getting a little sick of listening to D talk.

I know, I am bad - I love her but she has the tendency to just make crap up. If a story isn't interesting enough she will add some stupid detail that really doesn't matter but it makes her feel more important or something. I told all my friends to listen but throw away at least 10% of all her stories. Tuesday's phone count was about 30.

By Wednesday I was ready to say goodbye. I wanted my house back, I wanted my schedule back and I was on the verge of losing my sanity! Even back home we haven't really spent 5 solid days in a row together since...high school! We didn't do much, a little shopping then came home to watch TV. She called her husband for the like 50th time just to say goodnight and some how that pissed him off. I have no idea what was going on but he was complaining that she didn't talk to him at all the whole week and she didn't seem excited to come home. So she called him a girl and that really set him off! It turned into her screaming on the phone with him...so not OK. I may hate my upstairs neighbors because they are loud and ghetto but I don't want them thinking the same about me.

I was pretty pissed, I told her to tell him that they have spoken more these last 5 days than DH and I have the past 7 weeks! I gave up my evenings on IM with him, which is almost all of our communication, to hang out with her and she couldn't go 2 hours with out checking in?

I really hate that all that happened right before she left, because we had a really good weekend and that is what I want to remember. I love my sister but she is like anything else - better in moderation. That being said I miss her already! :)

I'll be back

D is here and we are having a great time. After she leaves I will update with all the shenanigans...and be excited the story will include about 20 pirates dancing on pianos and me and a 74 year old man!

And to hold you over:

i should be excited

D is going to be here in just a few days! I can't wait...I should have a little extra bounce in my step but I really don't. The first 5 weeks of DH being gone went so fast and were so easy and now it's slowing down. I am just in a funk. I have been working out so hard and I am not losing any weight and that is very discouraging. Also the reality is really hitting home - the odds of us getting pregnant in the ONE MONTH we have together before he's gone for another 3-5 months are not good. It's not like we will just be able to try again the next month, it will be several months and even then we will only have 1-2 months together before he is deployed again!

I am not getting enough sleep, I have to force myself into my bed. It's just so depressing. I hate making dinner for one, I want help with the dog...I need someone to bitch about work to - who doesn't work there! I know, suck it up, I'm trying.

I think I just need a big old cry fest. Hopefully my sister's visit will snap me out of all of this.

My cat is so good when I am in a crap-ass mood and she always tries to make me feel better, the last few nights she has decided this is what I need:
Very nice of her but it makes it hard to type... (like the raccoon eyes? I should really take my mascara off before I work out)

ugh

So this happened...
Then this...
So today I am this....HUNGOVER!

Now I am seeing that I like to be the DD because it keeps me from drinking too much. But My girlfriends wanted to get me drunk because hopefully I will be pregnant in a few months. But if I do say so myself, my skin is looking fab in that first pic (and I wasn't that drunk I just have a kick ass drunk face), that Clinique stuff seems to be working :)

I so hate wrong numbers

I was woken up very early this morning to a phone call from some hospital, I don't know where but it was a number that I don't know and the caller ID has some hospital name. That's a scary thing in itself but add that my husband is deployed and whoever it was hung up. WTF?! If you have the wrong number have the balls to say so. So here I am thinking that DH is injured and the phone lines went down. The lines go down a lot. Obviously I didn't go back to sleep for a while and I had to go find my skin first because I had jumped right out of it.

I know whoever it was had no idea what I was going through but still say "oh I'm sorry, I have the wrong number." All morning I was waiting for the phone to ring again or someone to come to my door. (If your soldier is injured but able to call you they do that other wise they send people to tell you.) Whatever, it's over. I took today off of work (they are so going to fire me haha) and tried to relax a bit.

As I was working out watching Sex and the City like always I realized I may want to switch up my workout DVDs because it's getting depressing. DH and I are not the most sexual couple and I have no problem admitting that, it's just not what is the most important to us so when he's gone it's not like I have issues with the lack of sex. Watching Sex and the City is like dangling a grade A cut of meat in front of a hungry vegetarian...they wont necessarily want to eat it but is sure will get them thinking. I don't know if that makes sense to you but it totally does in my head.

awww

The pooch is very cuddly tonight. He got sick when I came home from work and since then he's been next to me all night. Even when I was working out he was in the room with me and he hate how loud my elliptical is. Right now he's snuggling up on my leg. Poor little guy.

He wants his daddy home. I want his daddy home - I'm having a hard time. I hate when he calls and we have nothing to talk about, I know we aren't but I just can't help but think that we are drifting apart. Can I have him back now...please?

nothing like a new dress and a pair of spanx to make you feel hot!

Ever have one of those days where you just feel good about yourself? Mine have been few and far between since I have gained this last 10lbs and the fact that I have been working out like a crazy woman but not seeing results hasn't helped but today I know I look damn good! This is what I needed to encourage me to get back on the workout train because at the end of last week after I stopped my BC and Celexa I had zero motivation or energy (having your period and drug withdrawals simultaneously is never a good idea). I took a picture to show DH and since I am feeling so f'ing hot I will share it here :)

I am not really wearing Spanx, I am really wearing what I affectionately call my "fat pants" that I bought at Victoria's Secret in 2003 to wear for my college ball. They suck you in and smooth you out in all the right places - I love them! Maybe someday I wont need that and that will be great but until that day comes I have no problem rocking these bad boys!

In other news, this past weekend I also took on a project I have wanted to do since we moved in. I have been putting it off because I knew what a pain it would be but I am so glad it's done now. I took down the vertical blinds that came with the apartment and replaced them with some curtains. Not only were the blinds ugly but they were not very functional, we are on the first floor so it was all or nothing, either people can see into our place or we live in a dark cave like apartment. But here is what it looks like now and I LOVE it!

OK I better get some work done...I would hate to lose this wicked awesome job...

i heart my garmin

So after a day of shopping (and perhaps going a little overboard at south center) I was heading home and I remembered that somewhere on rt 167 there is a Jersey Mikes so I just typed it into my Garmin (I've named her Gertrude) and she guided me there. Pretty soon living without that is going to seem as crazy as living without my iPod. Yummy, I love me a steak and cheese. It brought me right back to NC, DH would pick up the subs and I would head down the street for a Cherry Limeade for me and an Ocean Water for him...well no Cherry limeade this time but oh well.

I was pretty stoked to get home and eat my lunch until some jackass cuts me off...well I just continued with my speed until I was a few inches from his bumper (I don't know about WA but in MA that's just what you do once you've been cut off - you need to make sure the douche bucket knows that he is, well a douche bucket!). So homeboy rolls down his window to flip me the bird which was nice then he does the old break check (didn't phase me, I was ready for that because that is my signature move). I just don't get it, when I cut someone off I am ready for the consequences. A few miles down the road he again slammed on his breaks again but this time it was all good because he was reacting to a cop and since I was cruising at about 70 in a 60 I was glad he was in front of me :) I was able to get back down to speed in the nick of time...cops in WA suck (nothing personal) but they give you NO cushion, back home 65 means 80 and everyone is happy, here 60 means 60 not even 65! Oh and I kinda need to get a WA licence because my RI one is kinda a lot expired...not good I am going to get myself arrested. But I do have my book to study because I get to take the riving test again! Just give me giant bangs and I am 16 again.

I would have to say today was a success, I have 2 new bras from VS ($45 each WTF) a new dress, some shirts, some yoga pants and a few other things. I had to call my mom and cuss her out for giving me her long damn legs. H&M has nice jeans at a really good price but no 29 34's...32 34s sure, apparently only fat chicks can be tall. (OK 32 is not really fat chick territory but I am annoyed) My mother pointed me to Wal-Mart for Levis longs but I think I am to snotty to ever buy jeans there - and not afraid to admit it!

OK I have to go, I am all over the place...I am trying to go cold turkey off my celexa and it's not happening...I need to go cut them in half because the withdrawals are hell. Apparently antidepressants can fool your body into not ovulating...it's not fair all men had to do is...well I think you know! ;)