he left. I'm drained. I treated myself to McDonalds (with a shake!) on the way home from post. I miss him already. I will be able to keep myself entertained because we bought me a Wii.
I will update more tomorrow when I can think clearly.
Please remember to pray for him and all the soldiers doing what they do.
31 January 2009
28 January 2009
feeling forgotten
I know that I joke about DH and his xBox playing but the truth is that it is really starting to get to me. I can count the chances we have to fall asleep together before he leaves on one hand but he is choosing to stay up super late playing hockey online.
It breaks my heart and I know it shouldn't but I can't help it. When he is gone falling asleep is one of the hardest things for me. I don't know if he knows this because I tend to keep my deployment struggles from him, he has enough to worry about. With him halfway out the door is it even worth me bringing up? These guys that he plays with are his friends and he's going to miss "hanging out" with them while he's gone but what about me?
He's pulling away, just like when he was picking fights with me, I get that. He is just trying to make his leaving easier on him but it is leaving a bad taste in my mouth. I don't want to spend the entire time that he's gone resenting him for the way he's treated me these past few weeks.
I am thinking that I will take the rest of the week off from work so that we can get back on the same page...even if we just sit around the house it will be better than me sitting unproductively at work getting madder and madder at him.
And this is why I wish he would just leave already!
It breaks my heart and I know it shouldn't but I can't help it. When he is gone falling asleep is one of the hardest things for me. I don't know if he knows this because I tend to keep my deployment struggles from him, he has enough to worry about. With him halfway out the door is it even worth me bringing up? These guys that he plays with are his friends and he's going to miss "hanging out" with them while he's gone but what about me?
He's pulling away, just like when he was picking fights with me, I get that. He is just trying to make his leaving easier on him but it is leaving a bad taste in my mouth. I don't want to spend the entire time that he's gone resenting him for the way he's treated me these past few weeks.
I am thinking that I will take the rest of the week off from work so that we can get back on the same page...even if we just sit around the house it will be better than me sitting unproductively at work getting madder and madder at him.
And this is why I wish he would just leave already!
27 January 2009
hey Apple, I don't like waiting!
When I turn on my mac I tend to trust it. When I see an update I tend to trust that too, I assumed that these updates are properly vetted and have survived many-a testing scenarios. I believed the word of the sales guy who told me that by spending $1700 on a computer we would be safer and have a much smoother time with everything. I was wrong.
OK, this is not a major catastrophe. I have not picked up a "sad mac" or any strange virus but I did install my QuickTime update unaware of the deadly toll it would take on my family...my Sims family that is.
I fell in love with the Sims in college, there were many nights spent making sure they ate and peed that I should have been making sure that I studied and slept! At that time my Sim was not a "Mrs. S" she was a "Mrs. R" and she was a Sim wife to Dan, my college boyfriend. That relationship ended in 2001 but my love for the Sims continued.
When DH left for Basic Training I bought myself the Sims Complete Collection, it included 7 expansion packs! It was a great distraction for me. Then in 2007 when we bought the iMac DH surprised me with Sims 2 and then again with the Pets expansion pack! I was able to make our entire family! It was a fun distraction while he was studying of playing his own video games.
I forgot about my Sims for a while, until a few months ago. I was complaining about DH's obsession with NHK2K8 on his Xbox and he asked why don't I just play the Sims, so I did and I remembered how fun it was! So for a while I have been hanging out with my Sims...until this past weekend.
I turned on my trusty iMac and see a new update and click install and think nothing of it then later that night I decided to play Sims. I clicked on the little icon and nothing...click click click click...NOTHING! So I decided to uninstall it and start over, the Mac retains some of the files so it would not erase everything so it wasn't a big deal. Once that was done I clicked on the icon, and nothing! Great, so I do the unthinkable...I delete all of my Sims files! Mr. & Mrs. S are dead...the critters are dead, gone! It wouldn't have been a big deal had it worked but it didn't! I killed them for nothing!
Anyway to make a long story...well it's still a long story...I emailed the game makers and apparently my QuickTime update is what did it, it seems to be causing problems with a lot of games and now we have to wait for Apple to fix it...better happen soon because DH is leaving before you know it!
OK, this is not a major catastrophe. I have not picked up a "sad mac" or any strange virus but I did install my QuickTime update unaware of the deadly toll it would take on my family...my Sims family that is.
I fell in love with the Sims in college, there were many nights spent making sure they ate and peed that I should have been making sure that I studied and slept! At that time my Sim was not a "Mrs. S" she was a "Mrs. R" and she was a Sim wife to Dan, my college boyfriend. That relationship ended in 2001 but my love for the Sims continued.
When DH left for Basic Training I bought myself the Sims Complete Collection, it included 7 expansion packs! It was a great distraction for me. Then in 2007 when we bought the iMac DH surprised me with Sims 2 and then again with the Pets expansion pack! I was able to make our entire family! It was a fun distraction while he was studying of playing his own video games.
I forgot about my Sims for a while, until a few months ago. I was complaining about DH's obsession with NHK2K8 on his Xbox and he asked why don't I just play the Sims, so I did and I remembered how fun it was! So for a while I have been hanging out with my Sims...until this past weekend.
I turned on my trusty iMac and see a new update and click install and think nothing of it then later that night I decided to play Sims. I clicked on the little icon and nothing...click click click click...NOTHING! So I decided to uninstall it and start over, the Mac retains some of the files so it would not erase everything so it wasn't a big deal. Once that was done I clicked on the icon, and nothing! Great, so I do the unthinkable...I delete all of my Sims files! Mr. & Mrs. S are dead...the critters are dead, gone! It wouldn't have been a big deal had it worked but it didn't! I killed them for nothing!
Anyway to make a long story...well it's still a long story...I emailed the game makers and apparently my QuickTime update is what did it, it seems to be causing problems with a lot of games and now we have to wait for Apple to fix it...better happen soon because DH is leaving before you know it!
26 January 2009
not the news I was hoping to hear
So I said last week that I had my review and that while my review was glowing my compensation was not. I let my boss know that I would like to be a salaried employee like almost everyone else in the front office. I would not require medical or dental so it's really just vacation time, sick days and holidays that would change. I have been a good employee, reliable and I get things done. Most of all I have results to back it all up! I have proven that I deserve to be here and me compensated!
Anyway, I reminded her that when I was hired I was told that I was only starting at such a low rate because it was a new position and after 6 months we would revisit it. I let her know the salary I desired and let her know that I expected to be made a salaried employee at the 6 month mark and she made it seem like it was all going to happen. To her credit she did fight for me, I heard her. Her parents (the owners) are just evil, they spent all this money on a plant in India but can't take care of their workers here.
I am very upset about it all - I could understand if I didn't get things done. My boss told me that while she would love me to stay here she doesn't want to hold me back in my career and let me know that she would be willing to wright a letter of recommendation. That was nice. Now I have some options. Believe me, I know that I am blessed to even be working in this economy but I think there is more out there for me. DH and I would like to move a little further south, closer to the army post so I will focus on that area - I would love to work on post, I have been keeping my eye on all the new listings there. I am not 100% going to leave, I live so close to the office so that is something to consider too...
What really surprised me about this all is DH's reaction when I told him the news, he knows how much I've done here, he sees me working off the clock at home when needed. He knows what was promised to me. Most of all he knows what I am worth. He will be supportive no matter what I decide and for that I am blessed.
And who knows what could happen, Seattle is just a short train ride away.
Oh but the good news is that I signed up for Aflac today so next year when it's time to have a rug rat I will have at least some income coming in for a bit (and with the plan I picked I get paid to have the baby!) So that is good, and I can take the plan with me if I do leave this job.
Anyway, I reminded her that when I was hired I was told that I was only starting at such a low rate because it was a new position and after 6 months we would revisit it. I let her know the salary I desired and let her know that I expected to be made a salaried employee at the 6 month mark and she made it seem like it was all going to happen. To her credit she did fight for me, I heard her. Her parents (the owners) are just evil, they spent all this money on a plant in India but can't take care of their workers here.
I am very upset about it all - I could understand if I didn't get things done. My boss told me that while she would love me to stay here she doesn't want to hold me back in my career and let me know that she would be willing to wright a letter of recommendation. That was nice. Now I have some options. Believe me, I know that I am blessed to even be working in this economy but I think there is more out there for me. DH and I would like to move a little further south, closer to the army post so I will focus on that area - I would love to work on post, I have been keeping my eye on all the new listings there. I am not 100% going to leave, I live so close to the office so that is something to consider too...
What really surprised me about this all is DH's reaction when I told him the news, he knows how much I've done here, he sees me working off the clock at home when needed. He knows what was promised to me. Most of all he knows what I am worth. He will be supportive no matter what I decide and for that I am blessed.
And who knows what could happen, Seattle is just a short train ride away.
Oh but the good news is that I signed up for Aflac today so next year when it's time to have a rug rat I will have at least some income coming in for a bit (and with the plan I picked I get paid to have the baby!) So that is good, and I can take the plan with me if I do leave this job.
24 January 2009
if only
Last night I had a crazy dream...we got word that the wives were allowed to go along! I was so excited. Obviously we wouldn't be fighting but we would stay back at the FOB (forward operating base) but most importantly, we would be together! DH and I were running around town getting me ready to go in a hurry so we wouldn't miss our plane.
I woke up wondering what I would do if this was an option. I know that this would NEVER be an option but the thought of it is interesting. I ultimately decided that I would not go, DH is there to work and no worry about what I am up to. Eventually I would like to visit the areas where he's been but not while we are still at war!
In other news, I still have a headache. I went back to the oral surgeon to be sure that the swelling in my gums, my jaw pain and my headache were all normal. It turns out that the swelling is because I am eating food that my mouth is not ready for (such as pizza), my jaw hurts because my TMJ and my headaches are a combination of the jaw and stress. I am kind of regretting the surgery but I really didn't have a choice - I just wish we had the money to see a dentist growing up because these teeth would have been removed over 10 years ago! And my jaw, I've been moving my jaw all around when food gets stuck in the holes that my teeth left, if I don't have that thing they gave me to flush them I kind of just try to suck it out (gross I know!) and that is really what is bothering me. The surgeon told me to get a message and that will help my head so I think I am going to make an appointment just as soon as I know for sure when DH is leaving.
I woke up wondering what I would do if this was an option. I know that this would NEVER be an option but the thought of it is interesting. I ultimately decided that I would not go, DH is there to work and no worry about what I am up to. Eventually I would like to visit the areas where he's been but not while we are still at war!
In other news, I still have a headache. I went back to the oral surgeon to be sure that the swelling in my gums, my jaw pain and my headache were all normal. It turns out that the swelling is because I am eating food that my mouth is not ready for (such as pizza), my jaw hurts because my TMJ and my headaches are a combination of the jaw and stress. I am kind of regretting the surgery but I really didn't have a choice - I just wish we had the money to see a dentist growing up because these teeth would have been removed over 10 years ago! And my jaw, I've been moving my jaw all around when food gets stuck in the holes that my teeth left, if I don't have that thing they gave me to flush them I kind of just try to suck it out (gross I know!) and that is really what is bothering me. The surgeon told me to get a message and that will help my head so I think I am going to make an appointment just as soon as I know for sure when DH is leaving.
23 January 2009
a little something from facebook
I got tagged with a "25 random things about you" something or another and I was a little board so I did it and since I have a headache and don't really have much to blog about here it is:
1. I hate facebook apps so don't feel bad when I ignore them
2. I've had a headache since I had my teeth removed and yesterday the Dr told me to get a message...now that's the kind of treatment I like
3. I am turning into an emotional mess getting ready for DH to leave
4. I feel bad saying it but I wish he would just go already because then we can start looking forward to him coming home and not dreading him leaving
5. I haven't been home since June 2007 and I miss everyone like crazy!
6. I kicked my caffeine addiction a few months ago
7. I drink herbal tea every morning.
8. I am sure as shit still best friends with my first girl friend Amanda!
9. I eat oatmeal and fruit for breakfast every work day
10. I think it's really funny that Amanda's parents wanted to name her after the Wendy's founder
11. I should be adding products to our amazon page and not playing on facebook!
12. Since I started working here my chocolate consumption has doubled...
13. I have been driving DH's car all week because he needs mine to pack all his stuff in, I miss my SUV!
14. I apply hand lotion about 7 times a day.
15. I apply chapstick about 12 times a day
16. I was crying just 15 minutes ago thinking about DH leaving
17. I wish I was stronger
18. I think about my father about 20 different times on any given day
19. I miss him and hope that he's proud of the woman that I've become
20. I love "to-do" lists, it makes me feel very organized and I get a little rush when I cross something off
21. I have such a bad case of TMJ that I am not allowed to bite into apples or chew gum
22. I worry that as I get older I will not be able to chew my food well enough to ear steak!
23. I want to go home but I am fairly certain that DH is going to be in the army for the next 16 years
24. I support his decision to serve and I will follow him wherever they decide to send us (just please, never to Korea!)
25. I burst out in tears every time I get an unexpected knock on my front door while DH is away
Yup, that's about it...still no update on the job situation, I hate waiting!
1. I hate facebook apps so don't feel bad when I ignore them
2. I've had a headache since I had my teeth removed and yesterday the Dr told me to get a message...now that's the kind of treatment I like
3. I am turning into an emotional mess getting ready for DH to leave
4. I feel bad saying it but I wish he would just go already because then we can start looking forward to him coming home and not dreading him leaving
5. I haven't been home since June 2007 and I miss everyone like crazy!
6. I kicked my caffeine addiction a few months ago
7. I drink herbal tea every morning.
8. I am sure as shit still best friends with my first girl friend Amanda!
9. I eat oatmeal and fruit for breakfast every work day
10. I think it's really funny that Amanda's parents wanted to name her after the Wendy's founder
11. I should be adding products to our amazon page and not playing on facebook!
12. Since I started working here my chocolate consumption has doubled...
13. I have been driving DH's car all week because he needs mine to pack all his stuff in, I miss my SUV!
14. I apply hand lotion about 7 times a day.
15. I apply chapstick about 12 times a day
16. I was crying just 15 minutes ago thinking about DH leaving
17. I wish I was stronger
18. I think about my father about 20 different times on any given day
19. I miss him and hope that he's proud of the woman that I've become
20. I love "to-do" lists, it makes me feel very organized and I get a little rush when I cross something off
21. I have such a bad case of TMJ that I am not allowed to bite into apples or chew gum
22. I worry that as I get older I will not be able to chew my food well enough to ear steak!
23. I want to go home but I am fairly certain that DH is going to be in the army for the next 16 years
24. I support his decision to serve and I will follow him wherever they decide to send us (just please, never to Korea!)
25. I burst out in tears every time I get an unexpected knock on my front door while DH is away
Yup, that's about it...still no update on the job situation, I hate waiting!
21 January 2009
2 for the price of...none (because they are free)
I was going to put this all in one blog but that last one took a dark turn so I decided to post 2. I am not sure if I have told you about my brother in law B, he is my sister D's husband. He and I have never really gotten along, we've never had any major blowouts but we both secretly dislike each other. He can just act like a baby, here's one example:
The day I got off the phone with now DH after we talked about getting married. I walked out to the living room we shared (I agreed to let him move in with my sister and myself) and announced, "I think I'm getting married" D was very happy for me but B stormed out of the apartment! D later told me that he wanted to propose to her around Christmas and my getting married at Christmas ruined it...which I still don't get but whatever.
I've also not been a fan of the way he treats her sometimes, there are moments when I think she settled. Why am I telling you this? Well on Monday he sent me an email asking me if the end of April would be a good time for D to come visit, he wants to surprise her with tickets for her birthday! I am almost in tears thinking about it! With work schedules and finances and DH's schedule I haven't seen her since her wedding in June 07.
I am hoping that it works out this time and if it does that I am able to keep the secret so she can really be surprised.
The day I got off the phone with now DH after we talked about getting married. I walked out to the living room we shared (I agreed to let him move in with my sister and myself) and announced, "I think I'm getting married" D was very happy for me but B stormed out of the apartment! D later told me that he wanted to propose to her around Christmas and my getting married at Christmas ruined it...which I still don't get but whatever.
I've also not been a fan of the way he treats her sometimes, there are moments when I think she settled. Why am I telling you this? Well on Monday he sent me an email asking me if the end of April would be a good time for D to come visit, he wants to surprise her with tickets for her birthday! I am almost in tears thinking about it! With work schedules and finances and DH's schedule I haven't seen her since her wedding in June 07.
I am hoping that it works out this time and if it does that I am able to keep the secret so she can really be surprised.
getting ready
It is a known phenomenon that when the person you love is getting ready to deploy the smallest thing can start a huge fight. Many fellow MS (military spouses) know this and have unfortunately lived through it. Last time he left it wasn't bad, I think a lot of that was that we were both so anxious, we had no idea what it was going to be like. Not this is our second time in less than a year so we know we can do it but we also know how miserable it can be. I've read a bunch of "loving a military man" type books and they all say that it's perfectly normal blah blah blah but when your husband is yelling at you because he wants you to walk the dog when he hasn't done it all day you don't care if it's normal, you just want him to shut up!
I was a psych minor in college so I am 100% qualified to give this diagnosis (I hope you can read my sarcasm) DH is trying to fight with me and push me away because that way him leaving will seem more like a much needed break and not him leaving the love of his life with the chance of never returning. Things at work aren't ideal either and it's got the both of us on edge. He's going out with guys that he has never worked with before and is expected to train the other medic...I can't tell you how uneasy it makes me to know that yet again the medic with DH will be sub par. But what is really disturbing is that they have issued him a new weapon. Yea no big deal right...wrong, HUGE deal. He's been training and deployed with the same weapon for the past 2 years, he knows everything there is to know about that particular weapon. Now he has to wait until he's away to familiarize himself, add his scope, zero it out and most of all trust this weapon. Last time he left I was 100% sure that he would come back to me, this time not so much. Wow long tangent...so he's stressed. I just hope he gets out of work early, can come home and relax a little and that he's done packing...I would love to have my car back - driving a Chevy Aveo hatchback is not my idea of a good time! (he needs my SUV because all his crap would never fit in his car).
Last night after work I unloaded a bunch of stuff from his car, that thing is like Marry Poppins's carpet bag...it's the size of a thumb tack yet I needed to make about 47 trips just to get everything out of it! I found 5 pairs of boots...5! A full set of ACUs, his Class A's(?) and all sorts of issued clothing that was still in it's plastic, about a load worth of what I assume to be dirty socks. Also loads or straw wrappers, receipts, a Coors light can! He assures me that it was just from helping a friend move, which I believe and I know he wasn't drinking it in his car but really, Coors - come on dude we don't drink cheap beer in this family! Anyway, after I got it all in the house and was organizing it I saw his boots all lined up on the wall and I couldn't resist:
I'm thinking of making a new layout with this picture! I love it :)
I was a psych minor in college so I am 100% qualified to give this diagnosis (I hope you can read my sarcasm) DH is trying to fight with me and push me away because that way him leaving will seem more like a much needed break and not him leaving the love of his life with the chance of never returning. Things at work aren't ideal either and it's got the both of us on edge. He's going out with guys that he has never worked with before and is expected to train the other medic...I can't tell you how uneasy it makes me to know that yet again the medic with DH will be sub par. But what is really disturbing is that they have issued him a new weapon. Yea no big deal right...wrong, HUGE deal. He's been training and deployed with the same weapon for the past 2 years, he knows everything there is to know about that particular weapon. Now he has to wait until he's away to familiarize himself, add his scope, zero it out and most of all trust this weapon. Last time he left I was 100% sure that he would come back to me, this time not so much. Wow long tangent...so he's stressed. I just hope he gets out of work early, can come home and relax a little and that he's done packing...I would love to have my car back - driving a Chevy Aveo hatchback is not my idea of a good time! (he needs my SUV because all his crap would never fit in his car).
Last night after work I unloaded a bunch of stuff from his car, that thing is like Marry Poppins's carpet bag...it's the size of a thumb tack yet I needed to make about 47 trips just to get everything out of it! I found 5 pairs of boots...5! A full set of ACUs, his Class A's(?) and all sorts of issued clothing that was still in it's plastic, about a load worth of what I assume to be dirty socks. Also loads or straw wrappers, receipts, a Coors light can! He assures me that it was just from helping a friend move, which I believe and I know he wasn't drinking it in his car but really, Coors - come on dude we don't drink cheap beer in this family! Anyway, after I got it all in the house and was organizing it I saw his boots all lined up on the wall and I couldn't resist:
I'm thinking of making a new layout with this picture! I love it :)
20 January 2009
hey! that's my song!
I am streaming the inauguration at work and WTF, they are using Simple Gifts?! Is this my dad's way of sticking it to me for backing McCain? It's OK dad, I will respect our new president, he is Will's boss after all.
19 January 2009
Back!
Dh is mad at me, he is sulking in the bedroom...tonight he's decided that he's going to bed early (he's going back to work tomorrow) and since he's in bed early I should be...then he pulls our the "I'm leaving soon" card BARF! Anyway, he's just being a jerk because I'm watching the bachelor and he thinks that it's a really dumb show - OK it is but that's why I LOVE it.
Our weekend was great though, our hotel was amazing, we had a room with THE view.
It was much closer than this picture shows (we were on 4th Ave). I loved it. We skipped the underground tour, that's OK I will just do that with a friend while he's gone. We got into town around 3:30 the walked to dinner at the Melting Pot, it was so good. I am not sure if the waitress thought I was nuts when I asked for a glass of warm water but I had to do something because (and this is gross) the food kept getting stuck in the holes that my teeth left and ice water was just too cold to semi rinse with. A few hours and a few hundred dollars later we were off to the concert.
The O.A.R. show was OK, not one of the best that I've seen from them - he venue was not the best for a rock show. We were standing under the balcony and the acoustics kinda sucked, I heard every word but DH doesn't know all the words and he had a hard time understanding them. The website that makes song lists didn't have "War Song" , sad :( that song is my ring tone with DH calls me, here are the lyrics.
Our weekend was great though, our hotel was amazing, we had a room with THE view.
It was much closer than this picture shows (we were on 4th Ave). I loved it. We skipped the underground tour, that's OK I will just do that with a friend while he's gone. We got into town around 3:30 the walked to dinner at the Melting Pot, it was so good. I am not sure if the waitress thought I was nuts when I asked for a glass of warm water but I had to do something because (and this is gross) the food kept getting stuck in the holes that my teeth left and ice water was just too cold to semi rinse with. A few hours and a few hundred dollars later we were off to the concert.The O.A.R. show was OK, not one of the best that I've seen from them - he venue was not the best for a rock show. We were standing under the balcony and the acoustics kinda sucked, I heard every word but DH doesn't know all the words and he had a hard time understanding them. The website that makes song lists didn't have "War Song" , sad :( that song is my ring tone with DH calls me, here are the lyrics.
"Wait, wait for my love
Don't forget me, never let me go
If you wait, wait for my love
I'll remember, never let you go
Until I'm fine, fine, fine
Until I'm fine, fine, fine"
Don't forget me, never let me go
If you wait, wait for my love
I'll remember, never let you go
Until I'm fine, fine, fine
Until I'm fine, fine, fine"
This song started and it was all I could do to not cry - it's soooooo soon and I am not looking forward to it at all! But I held it together so that's good.
After that we grabbed a cab back to the hotel, stopped at the market across the street and hung out and watched TV. In the AM we decided to go to Pike Place and get some yummy crepes and I picked up some dried flowers and were home in time for football.
So it was a good weekend...
I had my review at work today and I got nothing but raves but my boss did not have the news that I wanted to hear. I let her know in no uncertain but nice terms that I was not satisfied. I will meet with her again on Wednesday and discuss it further...I will talk about it more after I hear more.
After that we grabbed a cab back to the hotel, stopped at the market across the street and hung out and watched TV. In the AM we decided to go to Pike Place and get some yummy crepes and I picked up some dried flowers and were home in time for football.
So it was a good weekend...
I had my review at work today and I got nothing but raves but my boss did not have the news that I wanted to hear. I let her know in no uncertain but nice terms that I was not satisfied. I will meet with her again on Wednesday and discuss it further...I will talk about it more after I hear more.
16 January 2009
1903 miles
That is the distance to my closest Friendly's. 1903 miles and since I am only eating soft foods right now all I want is a Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup Sundae, vanilla ice cream, peanut butter topping, hot fudge, a mound of whipped topping, sprinkles and a cherry. It is unbelievable. I have tried non-Friendly's versions of this but they do no more than leave you craving the real thing. In the summer my friends and I would hit the Friendly's on the Cape Cod Canal every night, no word of a lie. Once someone got a drivers license we would all walk the canal then go get ice cream...and we could because active teenagers don't gain weight. Another perk of spending your summers camping on the Cape and not at home watching TV.
It's not just the ice cream that I love about this place (I am focusing on that now because it's all I could eat there at the moment). Friendly's makes a kick ass grilled cheese sandwich. It was my comfort food. Sure I can make grilled cheese at my house but it's not the same...I don't know what they do but their sandwich is magic...and the fries...YUM! My first job out of college was across the street from a Friendly's and when I was having a bad day, which was like once a week because my first job was as the receptionist and I was bitter because I had a marketing degree...yadda yadda yadda. Anyway, on those bad days I would call and order my grilled cheese sandwich with fries, no pickle then swing by, pick it up (less than $6!) and eat in my car while reading a cosmo. It always made me feel better.
On my next trip home hitting a Friendly's is right up there with catching a Sox game.
15 January 2009
thank you ancient Egyptians
I missed another day of work today...tooth pain kept me up all night last night. I am still swollen and it's just very annoying. Today was my post op appointment and the doctor said that I am healing very well and all the pain is to be expected given how impacted that particular tooth was. However she had the most wonderful thing for me, I don't know what it is called but it's some clove oil thing that the Egyptians discovered way back when for tooth pain. She threw some of that in my "holes" and the pain is pretty much gone! Loves it!
Unfortunately I am not allowed to eat solid food...I don't know what I am going to do on Sat night...cheat I guess. I have to tell you that I am starving! Oatmeal for breakfast, jamba juice fo lunch and tomato soup for dinner...blah! I want a steak.
One day closer to the big D...
Unfortunately I am not allowed to eat solid food...I don't know what I am going to do on Sat night...cheat I guess. I have to tell you that I am starving! Oatmeal for breakfast, jamba juice fo lunch and tomato soup for dinner...blah! I want a steak.
One day closer to the big D...
14 January 2009
making plans
This weekend is shaping up to be a good one, I just hope that DH lets it be fun. He has the tendency to act like a 4 year old if he doesn't get everything his way, if he decides that something is not going to be fun then he will do everything in his power to not have fun. I hope he knows how much stuff like this mean to me before he leaves and enjoys it.
We are going to do the Seattle Underground tour which I have heard nothing but good things about. I think it will be really cool to finally learn some history about this place (being a New England girl I am used to being surrounded by American history). Then we have reservations at The Melting Pot, I wanted a non chain restaurant at first but I think he will really enjoy this place, he was complaining that he will not have "good cheese" while he's gone and this way he can get his fill before he leaves. I am just bummed that I wont be able to have the cocktails I have heard great things about but pain meds + booze = no fun! Perhaps while the boys are gone I can go to the Melting Pot in Tacoma with some girls for a dessert and cocktail night.
Anyway...then we will be off to the concert. We've never been to one together! When we were dating this same band (OAR) was playing in Providence and I invited him to come but he was broke and didn't want me to have to pay :) It should be a good show, I've seen them 15 times before and have never been disappointed. After that it's just a short walk to our beautiful hotel! If we have time in the AM maybe we will check out the pool and hot tub! Finally I want to head to the market and get some fresh flowers (best thing about Pike Place!) and him some fresh crab meat and head home.
Haha now you can all come and stalk us.
News from the tooth front...I left work early because I was in so much pain...I think I am switching back to the perks because they did work better than the vikes. My post op is tomorrow so I will have some answers (I hope). I have decided to back on a soft food/liquid diet until I am feeling better. My favorite kitchen gadget is getting some good use. Tonight I had a strawberry banana low fat yogurt smoothie with some walnuts (you know to make it a little more filling) and I must say...it was FANTASTIC!
We are going to do the Seattle Underground tour which I have heard nothing but good things about. I think it will be really cool to finally learn some history about this place (being a New England girl I am used to being surrounded by American history). Then we have reservations at The Melting Pot, I wanted a non chain restaurant at first but I think he will really enjoy this place, he was complaining that he will not have "good cheese" while he's gone and this way he can get his fill before he leaves. I am just bummed that I wont be able to have the cocktails I have heard great things about but pain meds + booze = no fun! Perhaps while the boys are gone I can go to the Melting Pot in Tacoma with some girls for a dessert and cocktail night.
Anyway...then we will be off to the concert. We've never been to one together! When we were dating this same band (OAR) was playing in Providence and I invited him to come but he was broke and didn't want me to have to pay :) It should be a good show, I've seen them 15 times before and have never been disappointed. After that it's just a short walk to our beautiful hotel! If we have time in the AM maybe we will check out the pool and hot tub! Finally I want to head to the market and get some fresh flowers (best thing about Pike Place!) and him some fresh crab meat and head home.
Haha now you can all come and stalk us.
News from the tooth front...I left work early because I was in so much pain...I think I am switching back to the perks because they did work better than the vikes. My post op is tomorrow so I will have some answers (I hope). I have decided to back on a soft food/liquid diet until I am feeling better. My favorite kitchen gadget is getting some good use. Tonight I had a strawberry banana low fat yogurt smoothie with some walnuts (you know to make it a little more filling) and I must say...it was FANTASTIC!
13 January 2009
something new for the new year
After several renovations I think I have settled on this new design for the blog (if you are using Google Reader like I do you will have to actually visit my blog to see). I had a few glitches earlier but I think it's good and easy to read now, if not just let me know.
Today is my first day back to work, I really wanted to come in yesterday but the pain meds they gave me were just not cutting it and I was up ALL NIGHT Sunday night and ended up getting a new prescription yesterday. These pills I take every 6 hours as well but just like the last they seem to wear off around hour 4 :( I hope this goes away soon, I am ready to have my life back and enjoy these next few weeks with DH.
There was one other reason I couldn't sleep on Sunday night, around 3AM when my alarm went off to remind me to take my pills (not like I needed it) DH came in to see what was going on. I told him that I can't sleep and that he needs to come to bed to help me sleep, he did. We were laying there looking at the ceiling chatting, I asked him why he couldn't sleep and he said that he is just thinking about going over there again. I reassured him that I would be fine, I did well last time he was gone, I hated it but I did great. He then told me that he wasn't really worried about that, he had a feeling that this time something is going to happen. He said he isn't sure that it will be serious but he really thinks that he will end up coming home early injured.
What do you say to that? I just let him know that I really didn't think it was going to happen, I have a really strong intuition when the people I love are in danger and so far I have nothing but good feelings about this next tour. He is going over there with a new group of guys and I know that has to be hard for him but he's a good soldier who knows what he's doing. I also let him know that if he is right and something does happen we will deal with it. I am not going anywhere, I married him for his heart, not his athletic ability or handsome face (those are just perks!). I reassured him that we've been through far to much to let some silly thing like a war wound break us.
It pains me that he worries, if I could wish for anything in the world right now it would be that he didn't have that fear. Right now I am putting it in God's hands. If for some reason it is God's will that DH is injured over there I just have to have faith that it is nothing that we can't handle together. But please God, no unexpected knocks on the door if you can help it, I don't know if I am as strong as Cheryl, Karie, and no where near as strong as Heidi .
Today is my first day back to work, I really wanted to come in yesterday but the pain meds they gave me were just not cutting it and I was up ALL NIGHT Sunday night and ended up getting a new prescription yesterday. These pills I take every 6 hours as well but just like the last they seem to wear off around hour 4 :( I hope this goes away soon, I am ready to have my life back and enjoy these next few weeks with DH.
There was one other reason I couldn't sleep on Sunday night, around 3AM when my alarm went off to remind me to take my pills (not like I needed it) DH came in to see what was going on. I told him that I can't sleep and that he needs to come to bed to help me sleep, he did. We were laying there looking at the ceiling chatting, I asked him why he couldn't sleep and he said that he is just thinking about going over there again. I reassured him that I would be fine, I did well last time he was gone, I hated it but I did great. He then told me that he wasn't really worried about that, he had a feeling that this time something is going to happen. He said he isn't sure that it will be serious but he really thinks that he will end up coming home early injured.
What do you say to that? I just let him know that I really didn't think it was going to happen, I have a really strong intuition when the people I love are in danger and so far I have nothing but good feelings about this next tour. He is going over there with a new group of guys and I know that has to be hard for him but he's a good soldier who knows what he's doing. I also let him know that if he is right and something does happen we will deal with it. I am not going anywhere, I married him for his heart, not his athletic ability or handsome face (those are just perks!). I reassured him that we've been through far to much to let some silly thing like a war wound break us.
It pains me that he worries, if I could wish for anything in the world right now it would be that he didn't have that fear. Right now I am putting it in God's hands. If for some reason it is God's will that DH is injured over there I just have to have faith that it is nothing that we can't handle together. But please God, no unexpected knocks on the door if you can help it, I don't know if I am as strong as Cheryl, Karie, and no where near as strong as Heidi .
11 January 2009
All is quiet
As I look around the room I see all my lovies sleeping at 1PM on a lazy Sunday afternoon. The pooch is on his pet bed...with his rawhide close by. The cat is on the Blue-Ray player enjoying the warmth from the cable box below. DH is on the chase side of the couch. It's very peaceful and reassuring at the moment, I love having the family all in one room. I am at it again if you cant tell...soon we will be down to three.
All the drama with my wisdom teeth (which I know isn't much drama but to me it was huge since I've been putting it off for years) took my mind off the fact that he is leaving soon. Well I am on the mend and now we have one less weekend. Next weekend we have concert tickets in the "big city" and I keep talking about booking a room near the venue I think I am just going to do it. It will be a nice little get away, if just for a night.
As for right now I am just enjoying the fact that my wonderful husband is sleeping safely not even three feet from me. Life is good.
All the drama with my wisdom teeth (which I know isn't much drama but to me it was huge since I've been putting it off for years) took my mind off the fact that he is leaving soon. Well I am on the mend and now we have one less weekend. Next weekend we have concert tickets in the "big city" and I keep talking about booking a room near the venue I think I am just going to do it. It will be a nice little get away, if just for a night.
As for right now I am just enjoying the fact that my wonderful husband is sleeping safely not even three feet from me. Life is good.
10 January 2009
I am not very smart sometimes
So I woke up right on time, 6AM to take my pain meds exactly 6 hours after my last round. So I carefully get out of bed with out waking up a hungover DH, I head to the fridge for some yummy yogurt so I have something in my stomach (careful not to wake the sleeping pooch). For the next two hours I was laying in bed in extreme pain freaking out that the crazy strong pills are no longer working.
DH tells me just to take another one, he's trained with meds so I know that it's OK until he hands be a bottle...THIS ISN'T WHAT I TOOK! Gah! I took the anti nausea stuff thinking it was pain meds...anyway, I have since taken my lovely pain meds and the pain on the right side of my face is finally subsiding. (good news though, without meds the left side of my face was feeling pretty good!)
DH tells me just to take another one, he's trained with meds so I know that it's OK until he hands be a bottle...THIS ISN'T WHAT I TOOK! Gah! I took the anti nausea stuff thinking it was pain meds...anyway, I have since taken my lovely pain meds and the pain on the right side of my face is finally subsiding. (good news though, without meds the left side of my face was feeling pretty good!)
09 January 2009
4 teeth less
So after a 3 hour delay in surgery I was finally able to have my teeth removed. So far so good, I've even been able to eat a cup of yogurt! We had to stop at Target for my prescription and that took forever, I napped a bit in the car and got totally confused when I woke up.
DH has been amazing, i mean AMAZING! helping me move around getting me a milkshake and putting it in a bowl for me, checking on my, getting my yogurt. He is so concerned for my comfort (even offered to turn the xbox on when I emerged from the bedroom. Best of all, coming into the house I felt nauseous and he helped me rush to his bathroom and held my hair back.
Only an hour until I can take my next round of pills, it can't come soon enough the pain is so bad!
before heading to my original appointment (I wasn't allowed makeup)
DH has been amazing, i mean AMAZING! helping me move around getting me a milkshake and putting it in a bowl for me, checking on my, getting my yogurt. He is so concerned for my comfort (even offered to turn the xbox on when I emerged from the bedroom. Best of all, coming into the house I felt nauseous and he helped me rush to his bathroom and held my hair back.
Only an hour until I can take my next round of pills, it can't come soon enough the pain is so bad!
before heading to my original appointment (I wasn't allowed makeup)
In the parking at target, all drugged up
07 January 2009
Q&A
So I am on a military wives message board and it is my turn for the week long Q&A, here are some of the fun questions I've been asked so far:
When you were little, what was your favorite game? There is a board game called Encore where you have to think of songs with a particular word in it and each team goes back and forth until they run out of songs (or time). We would play it as a family and all 7 of us had very different musical taste so it was always a lot of fun.
What is the most fun about being a military wife to you? Umm I am not really sure, I love being a wife I think that is fun as for the military...it sure does take him away a lot! I would have to say the pride I take in him and the knowledge that I am strong enough to handle it.
What is one goal you have set for this year? Get out from under DH's crappy car and buy him the truck he wants.
What is your dream vacation? Right now, Boston in the spring with tickets to an entire weekend series with the Yankees. I miss home so much. I miss Fenway! We would stay on the water and if people wanted to see us they would come to us, we wouldn't have to run around from house to house, we wouldn't have to leave the city!
Who is your favorite player on the Red Sox? Oh I can't pick just one! I love Jason Varitek but I have no idea if he'll be back next year, it breaks my heart that he is working with Boras. Papelbon is up there, my husband wants to divorce me and marry him but I don't hold that against him. Then Pedroia, how can you not love the little man? The team as a whole is fantastic and now that Manny is gone it's pretty drama free, just how I like it! Good question!
What is your dream job? I was asked this at my interview for my current job and I think they wanted me to say something to do with chocolate but I said "Marketing Manager for the Boston Red Sox" haha. I think they were a little surprised but can you imagine how amazing that would be? I would have my hands in almost every part of the club...a girl can dream
What is your biggest pet peeve? When people use "I" when they really mean "me" - here is a little tip...if you are not sure if you use "I" instead of "me" take the other subjects out of the sentence...
"Here is a picture of Mom, Dad, and I on the plane" Would you ever say "Here is a picture of I on the plane"? No, no you wouldn't so the correct way to say this is "Here is a picture of Mom, Dad, and me on the plane" or "Here is a picture of me on the plane"
Get it? Good, learn it, live it and love it!
You mentioned the other day that your family didn't want you to get married (if I remember right). What was their reason for that? Because DH and I had only known each other for 4 months at the time of our wedding. Also, they didn't think I was ready for this lifestyle, that being said they were all very happy for me and made our day special - but they did pressure me into a few things that I wish I had stood firm on, like my dress...I wanted a tea length dress with beading that would have been perfect for December but they all said I needed to wear a floor length one...perhaps if I had gotten the dress I wanted I wouldn't have "accidentally" left it at the cleaners 3 years ago
If you could go back and do things over again, would you? nope, not in a million years!
Do you get manicures/pedicures often? No, manicures almost never last on me so it's kind of a waste of money. I like to get a pedi at least once a spring/summer but I get nervous, my toenail fell off in Dec 05 after getting one at a mall salon!
If you were a color which one and why? Orange because it can seem out of place and a bit abrasive at first but with the right colors around it and a little time to adjust you can't picture life without it :)
If your life story were a movie who would play you and DH? hmmmmmm me, maybe Reese Witherspoon with darker hair...I like her and she doesn't have the perfect figure all the time and she seems like she would put you in your place if you disrespected someone she loves. DH...hmmmm someone goofy but handsome with a dark side...hmmm...Ryan Gossling, if they could make him look Portuguese (because I look so much like Reese, obviously!)
When you were little, what was your favorite game? There is a board game called Encore where you have to think of songs with a particular word in it and each team goes back and forth until they run out of songs (or time). We would play it as a family and all 7 of us had very different musical taste so it was always a lot of fun.
What is the most fun about being a military wife to you? Umm I am not really sure, I love being a wife I think that is fun as for the military...it sure does take him away a lot! I would have to say the pride I take in him and the knowledge that I am strong enough to handle it.
What is one goal you have set for this year? Get out from under DH's crappy car and buy him the truck he wants.
What is your dream vacation? Right now, Boston in the spring with tickets to an entire weekend series with the Yankees. I miss home so much. I miss Fenway! We would stay on the water and if people wanted to see us they would come to us, we wouldn't have to run around from house to house, we wouldn't have to leave the city!
Who is your favorite player on the Red Sox? Oh I can't pick just one! I love Jason Varitek but I have no idea if he'll be back next year, it breaks my heart that he is working with Boras. Papelbon is up there, my husband wants to divorce me and marry him but I don't hold that against him. Then Pedroia, how can you not love the little man? The team as a whole is fantastic and now that Manny is gone it's pretty drama free, just how I like it! Good question!
What is your dream job? I was asked this at my interview for my current job and I think they wanted me to say something to do with chocolate but I said "Marketing Manager for the Boston Red Sox" haha. I think they were a little surprised but can you imagine how amazing that would be? I would have my hands in almost every part of the club...a girl can dream
What is your biggest pet peeve? When people use "I" when they really mean "me" - here is a little tip...if you are not sure if you use "I" instead of "me" take the other subjects out of the sentence...
"Here is a picture of Mom, Dad, and I on the plane" Would you ever say "Here is a picture of I on the plane"? No, no you wouldn't so the correct way to say this is "Here is a picture of Mom, Dad, and me on the plane" or "Here is a picture of me on the plane"
Get it? Good, learn it, live it and love it!
You mentioned the other day that your family didn't want you to get married (if I remember right). What was their reason for that? Because DH and I had only known each other for 4 months at the time of our wedding. Also, they didn't think I was ready for this lifestyle, that being said they were all very happy for me and made our day special - but they did pressure me into a few things that I wish I had stood firm on, like my dress...I wanted a tea length dress with beading that would have been perfect for December but they all said I needed to wear a floor length one...perhaps if I had gotten the dress I wanted I wouldn't have "accidentally" left it at the cleaners 3 years ago
If you could go back and do things over again, would you? nope, not in a million years!
Do you get manicures/pedicures often? No, manicures almost never last on me so it's kind of a waste of money. I like to get a pedi at least once a spring/summer but I get nervous, my toenail fell off in Dec 05 after getting one at a mall salon!
If you were a color which one and why? Orange because it can seem out of place and a bit abrasive at first but with the right colors around it and a little time to adjust you can't picture life without it :)
If your life story were a movie who would play you and DH? hmmmmmm me, maybe Reese Witherspoon with darker hair...I like her and she doesn't have the perfect figure all the time and she seems like she would put you in your place if you disrespected someone she loves. DH...hmmmm someone goofy but handsome with a dark side...hmmm...Ryan Gossling, if they could make him look Portuguese (because I look so much like Reese, obviously!)
06 January 2009
ugh!!!
Up until 2 minutes ago I think that the dental hygienist was the only person who could make you feel like a 7 year old again but I was wrong. Apparently a PR agency can do the same thing! We, at the chocolate company, retain the services of a well known PR agency and then send our products to magazines, candy blogs, TV shows (we were on Rachael Ray again over Christmas) and all sorts of people who can promote us. It's a good way to get our name out - we need them to associate us with these high end media outlets.
Here is the process, I get an email "send 2 boxes of X to Good Housekeeping" or something like that so I immediately go to the sample request page on the intranet and get the ball rolling. There is no need to push it off, requesting samples is one of the easiest things I do. The problem is the next step - the request needs to be approved by my boss before it goes anywhere. I am sure she gets an email or some notice that a new request has been submitted but time after time she does NOTHING with them. Then I get emails accusing me of not doing my job and the fun getting talked down to.
I am just so frustrated because I can either A) throw my boss under the buss and save my own ass or B) look like an idiot for her sake (again) and act like I've been slacking. I know all the woman's magazines and office answer people would say that I should suck it up and always make my boss look good but if I keep doing that how will she learn? (haha I'm ready for motherhood)
I am just so frustrated! I am trying to fit 5 days worth of work into 3 days so I don't have to worry while I am recovering from my wisdom teeth surgery (more fun details on that to follow) but I am stuck putting out little fires all over the place...AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
OK so I went to see the oral surgeon today about my teeth and never before has 28 felt so OLD! Because of my age the recovery is going to be much harder. Because of my age the teeth are going to take a lot of work to get out. Because of my age my face will probably look like I went 3 rounds with Holyfield. I get it...I am screwed! The roots are long and sturdy which is great to know about all the teeth I wish to keep but not on those that need to be removed. This is not going to be fun.
Here is the process, I get an email "send 2 boxes of X to Good Housekeeping" or something like that so I immediately go to the sample request page on the intranet and get the ball rolling. There is no need to push it off, requesting samples is one of the easiest things I do. The problem is the next step - the request needs to be approved by my boss before it goes anywhere. I am sure she gets an email or some notice that a new request has been submitted but time after time she does NOTHING with them. Then I get emails accusing me of not doing my job and the fun getting talked down to.
I am just so frustrated because I can either A) throw my boss under the buss and save my own ass or B) look like an idiot for her sake (again) and act like I've been slacking. I know all the woman's magazines and office answer people would say that I should suck it up and always make my boss look good but if I keep doing that how will she learn? (haha I'm ready for motherhood)
I am just so frustrated! I am trying to fit 5 days worth of work into 3 days so I don't have to worry while I am recovering from my wisdom teeth surgery (more fun details on that to follow) but I am stuck putting out little fires all over the place...AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
OK so I went to see the oral surgeon today about my teeth and never before has 28 felt so OLD! Because of my age the recovery is going to be much harder. Because of my age the teeth are going to take a lot of work to get out. Because of my age my face will probably look like I went 3 rounds with Holyfield. I get it...I am screwed! The roots are long and sturdy which is great to know about all the teeth I wish to keep but not on those that need to be removed. This is not going to be fun.
05 January 2009
I had a little panic attack today...
I was calling around to see if anyone can fit me in to get my wisdom teeth pulled before DH leaves...I really didn't think I would find anyone on such shot notice and that would be my excuse for not getting it done. Well I have my consolation tomorrow and surgery on Thursday!!! Holy cow! But I am glad that it's right away so I have less time to stress about it. I know it needs to be done, I can't reach them with my tooth brush and there are a few cavities in them and they really need to be gone before I get pregnant again but I DON'T WANNA! I now have to postpone my 6 month review (and raise) that was scheduled for Friday and that is a big bummer but it's important to me to have DH here for this. I will need someone to get me ice cream and make me mashed potatoes. Hopefully tomorrow they will say it will be a very easy (and cheap) extraction.
If I do start posting this weekend and you can't figure out what I am trying to say it will just be the drugs talking!
Look at me go, not even a week into the new year and one of my major goals is about to be crossed off my list.
If I do start posting this weekend and you can't figure out what I am trying to say it will just be the drugs talking!
Look at me go, not even a week into the new year and one of my major goals is about to be crossed off my list.
04 January 2009
reason number 2546783 why I love my husband...
Picture this...candle light, soft music, a glass of wine, a freshly drawn bath, and...Mr. Freaking Bubbles! haha. We aren't so good at waiting for Christmas to exchange gifts so we did stockings on Christmas Eve. He wasn't sure what to put in a stocking so I told him usually little stupid toys, socks, bubble bath candy...things like that. I was hoping he would drop by the Victoria's Secret or Bath and Body Works section of the PX and get me my favorite...peppermint.
When he told me that he did all his shopping at Fred Meyer (a chain kind of like Wal-Mart but with higher prices and less selection) I still had hope.
I dumped out my stocking and was shocked, he had done so well! Slipper socks - I didn't even tell him that was a given every year growing up. I small Nerf gun - classic! Candy and there it was...bubble bath. Mr. Bubbles! Haha, he swears that he remembers me having it at our last duty station...not so. He also gave me some Sesame Street stuff that you can wright on the wall with. How cute is that?
So right now I smell like Mr. Bubbles but it's OK...I love him for making the effort. He knows how much I LOVE bubble baths. As for the Sesame Street Stuff...I think while he's gone I will send him a picture of me covered with bubbles and on the wall it will say "Wish you were here" :) Don't worry, it will be classy(ish), I know that nothing is private when sent over seas.
I love that man.
When he told me that he did all his shopping at Fred Meyer (a chain kind of like Wal-Mart but with higher prices and less selection) I still had hope.
I dumped out my stocking and was shocked, he had done so well! Slipper socks - I didn't even tell him that was a given every year growing up. I small Nerf gun - classic! Candy and there it was...bubble bath. Mr. Bubbles! Haha, he swears that he remembers me having it at our last duty station...not so. He also gave me some Sesame Street stuff that you can wright on the wall with. How cute is that?
So right now I smell like Mr. Bubbles but it's OK...I love him for making the effort. He knows how much I LOVE bubble baths. As for the Sesame Street Stuff...I think while he's gone I will send him a picture of me covered with bubbles and on the wall it will say "Wish you were here" :) Don't worry, it will be classy(ish), I know that nothing is private when sent over seas.
I love that man.
make it stop!
Now that I have a tentative date I keep doing it..."only x more weekends," "only x more nights to fight over the covers," only, only, only! I hate it!! We've done this before (less than a year ago actually!) and I know that it is key to just enjoy the time that we have.
No more only - PLEASE!
In other news, I got a stern talking to at the dentist's office. OK, I will start to floss! Anything to avoid feeling like in am in grade school getting a lecture again. The hygienist was really nice about it but still I had no excuse - like a child I don't do it because it's annoying. Grrr I will floss from now on...truth be told before this past June I hadn't been to the dentist in well over 10 years. Growing up it was a luxury we just couldn't afford and by the time I had my own insurance I was terrified of what they might find after such neglect. After quite a bit of scraping and chiseling I only had 2 small cavities! The goal is to find someone who can do a quickie wisdom teeth removal while DH is still in town then I will get my cavities filled in Feb. From here on out it's preventative maintenance no more neglect!
No more only - PLEASE!
In other news, I got a stern talking to at the dentist's office. OK, I will start to floss! Anything to avoid feeling like in am in grade school getting a lecture again. The hygienist was really nice about it but still I had no excuse - like a child I don't do it because it's annoying. Grrr I will floss from now on...truth be told before this past June I hadn't been to the dentist in well over 10 years. Growing up it was a luxury we just couldn't afford and by the time I had my own insurance I was terrified of what they might find after such neglect. After quite a bit of scraping and chiseling I only had 2 small cavities! The goal is to find someone who can do a quickie wisdom teeth removal while DH is still in town then I will get my cavities filled in Feb. From here on out it's preventative maintenance no more neglect!
03 January 2009
stressed
Since I got the news that DH is leaving so soon (which really shouldn't have come as a shock but since he reenlisted I really thought he would go to the training and not overseas) I've had a knot in my stomach. Things are going so well with us I don't want him to leave. Every day we are having fun and laughing. When he is gone I become a prisoner to my cell phone, fearing that I'll miss one of his few calls. I become locked to my computer fearing that he will be on IM and I will miss him. I become someone that others walk on egg shells around and that really gets to me.
I hate it. I am strong and I pull through, I thrive actually but it doesn't mean that it's easy or that I like it.
I am just nervous...I don't want to be lonely. I don't want to be scared at night when I hear a noise. I don't want to cry over really stupid things. I don't want people to see me do that and assume that I am a mess. I don't want to be a 28 year old widow.
There really is no point to any of this I just needed to get it out.
I hate it. I am strong and I pull through, I thrive actually but it doesn't mean that it's easy or that I like it.
I am just nervous...I don't want to be lonely. I don't want to be scared at night when I hear a noise. I don't want to cry over really stupid things. I don't want people to see me do that and assume that I am a mess. I don't want to be a 28 year old widow.
There really is no point to any of this I just needed to get it out.
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