Doc had his going away party last night. It was just with the guys that he has been close with and not at all formal. It was nice for him to have one last get together with guys who have done the same crazy shit that he has, I don't know when he will get to swap war stories like that again.
They did their little "Did you know Doc could dance..." speeches and all that fun stuff then it was time for him to talk. He told them what a trooper I've been. How I have taken care of him since day one and how hard he has made it for me. He went on for about 5 minutes about me, I cried of course but I not really for the right reasons.
What he was saying was true, he's not the man I married any more, he never will be again. That is really sad but what really got me, and kind of pissed me off is that it took this - a semi-public setting for him to acknowledge to me, all that I have done for him. Once in a while it would be nice to be appreciated at home when there isn't a captive audience.
I am not prefect, I know that. I have not followed the prefect TBI wife handbook, I make mistakes. I know I could be doing a better job with a lot of things but I kind of stopped caring, why should I when he doesn't? The little pat on the back last night was night but how about a little less talking about how appreciative he is and a little more acting like it.
I hope this is a funk brought on by the stress of the move and some other stuff going on in my life, the holidays will be no fun if all I do is focus on the bad.
♥ - Amber
I know exactly what you mean. It is one thing to say it out loud, it almost makes a person look good to say stuff like that, but it keeps it from being something he has to do something about ... if he keeps it from being one-on-one personal. In a very different circumstance, I've been there. I hope things shift in a good way as time passes. No one wants to be a kicking bag.
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